Book Description
In his most extraordinary book, "one of the great clinical writers of the 20th century" (The New York Times) recounts the case histories of patients lost in the bizarre, apparently inescapable world of neurological disorders. Oliver Sacks's The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat tells the stories of individuals afflicted with fantastic perceptual and intellectual aberrations: patients who have lost their memories and with them the greater part of their pasts; who are no longer able to recognize people and common objects; who are stricken with violent tics and grimaces or who shout involuntary obscenities; whose limbs have become alien; who have been dismissed as retarded yet are gifted with uncanny artistic or mathematical talents.
If inconceivably strange, these brilliant tales remain, in Dr. Sacks's splendid and sympathetic telling, deeply human. They are studies of life struggling against incredible adversity, and they enable us to enter the world of the neurologically impaired, to imagine with our hearts what it must be to live and feel as they do. A great healer, Sacks never loses sight of medicine's ultimate responsibility: "the suffering, afflicted, fighting human subject."
Customer Reviews:
One Of The Greatest Clinical Writers Of The Twentieth Century.......2007-10-10
"ONE OF THE GREATEST CLINICAL WRITERS OF THE TWENTIETH CENTURY."
---New York Times
"From world-famous neurolotist Dr. Oliver Sacks comes a bestselling collection of fascinating clinical tales representing an intriguing and touching investigation into the complexities of the human mind.
Dr. Sacks draws listeners into the strage and fascinating world of his neurologically impaired patients with humor and compassion:
here are individuals afflicted with fantastic perceptual and intellectual aberrations;
patients who have lost their memory and with it the greater part of their past;
who are no longer able to recognize people and common objects, although they can see perfectly;
who are possessed by violent tics and grimaces or who involuntarily shout obscenities;
whose own limbs have become alien;
who have been dismissed as retarded,
yet are gifted with unexpected strengths and talents.
At once inconceivably strange and deeply human,
these tales are studies of life struggling against incredible adversity,
and they enable us to enter the world of the neurologically impaired,
to imagine with our hearts what it must be to live and feel as they do."
"Oliver Sacks is Professor of Clinical Neurology at Albert Einstein College of Medicine."
"The book
THE MAN WHO MISTOOK HIS WIFE FOR A HAT
is published by Harper Petennial
Contents: 2 audio cassettes in standard plastic cases inside the paper case.
Running time: Approximately 3 hours.
Abridged with music.
Performance and copyright 1990 HarperCollins Publishers, Inc.
ISBN 1 55994 368 8."
[from the back of case]
A mind is a wonderful thing to explore.......2007-08-13
I bought this book for only one of its chapters as research for a screenplay, but ended up reading the whole thing. It is fascinating and will give you an appreciation for your own (hopefully functioning) brain. Each story is complete in itself, so it would make for good commuting or bedtime reading.
The Man Who Wrote this book mistook his patients for hats.......2007-07-15
Dr. Sacks' collection of clinical tales is obviously outdated, however this is not its greatest flaw. All of these stories are indeed remarkable, and they speak to the mysterious nature of the human mind and of course to human resilience. It is incredibly fascinating to think how one's individual nature and function can change in response to a neurological change. Dr. Sacks attempts to introduce and involve the reader in his patients' lives, but unfortunately fails to do so. The reader only establishes a superficial connection with the "client," as Dr. Sacks treats his patients as if they were just scientific specimens. In particular, I had a problem with his language and judgment. In "The World of the Simple," he talks about a mentally retarded girl Rebecca..."one sees this with infants, one sees it with the senile, most poignantly, with the Rebeccas of this world" (186). Rebeccas of this world? I was under the impression that he wrote this book to present the individuality and uniqueness of his patients? He simply calls her "mentally defective" (185). In talking about his Autist Artist, Dr. Sacks concludes that Jose will just "do nothing, and spend a useless, fruitless life, as so many other autistic people do, overlooked, unconsidered, in the back ward of a state hospital." I completely agree that people suffering from autism should be given a chance in the workplace, to be offered opportunities to live a real life. However, I do not agree that it is up to Dr. Sacks to decide and declare Jose's life fruitless if he does not work lives up to his social value. Aside from Dr. Sacks' extremely pretentious tone, he does attempt to explore the inner life and conflict of his patients in an interesting way.
Fascinating.......2007-04-18
Each mind described in this book is completely enthralling. You're left wanting to hear more - wondering how Dr. Sacks could hold back from experiments and asking question after question. On the contrary, Dr. Sacks treats all these patients with a high degree of respect and patience. I'm still pondering some of the questions raised in the book - interesting enough, the one that I most remember is the question about our soul...
DON'T MISS IT!.......2007-03-18
One of the most stolen books in our high school library and a very good read for all ages,this is but one of several eclectic books by Oliver Sacks,part of whose work was the subject of the movie Awakenings.
Book Description
Wholeness and Healing for Women Caught in the Crossfire.
As the wife of a man who is addicted to lust, pornography, or masturbation, you are not alone. Millions of men can’t get through the day or the week without clicking on to their favorite Internet porn sites, thumbing through adult magazines, or watching sensual videos–and millions of wives suffer as a result.
Over the past decade, nearly 400,000 men have found inspiration and hope in Every Man’s Battle, the best-selling men’s guide to victory over sexual sin. Now, here at last is the book for every woman who has become a casualty in the fight for sexual purity. Every Heart Restored offers godly guidance and wisdom for a woman facing such personal betrayal.
“WHAT DOES GOD EXPECT FROM ME?”
“HOW CAN I TRUST AGAIN?”
“IS IT POSSIBLE TO OVERCOME PAIN AND UNFORGIVENESS?”
“CAN MY MARRIAGE BE REBUILT?”
“WHAT IF I JUST WANT OUT?”
Filled with stories from wives and husbands at every stage in the struggle for sexual purity, Every Heart Restored addresses the questions and real-life issues that matter to you most. Whether you are facing the startling new revelation of your husband’s sin, dealing with a long-term problem, or cleaning out an old wound, Every Heart Restored will meet you where you are and guide you to healing greater than you imagine possible.
Also available: Every Heart Restored Workbook
Customer Reviews:
Deceptive Title.......2007-07-14
If you've just been hit with the revelation of your husband's "secret life", this book may not help. The title is deceptive because it implies that you will be healed after reading it.(Healing is God's job!) I was frustrated with the first few chapters, because it dealt with man's sexuality rather than the wife's torment. My raw agony was nowhere to be found within the pages of this book. However, this book was still useful. Overall, the book was all right.
There were nuggets of practical advice and hope. I liked the way views from both wives and husbands were presented. The most important thing I learned was that it is possible for a husband to love his wife and still sin against her. I don't understand it or like it, but I believe it and this book does a good job of introducing that concept. I also learned a lot about the importance of a Christian wife's role of encouraging her husband spiritually. I liked Fred's description about how Brenda influenced him by lovingly refusing to accept anything less than righteousness from him. I also liked Brenda's attitude that her destiny is forever entwined with Fred's and that when one sins it pollutes the stream for both of them.
If you are in deep pain right now, understand that healing will take lots of time and lots of God. This book won't fix you or your marriage, but it can give you some insight and encouragement. For biblical healing, I strongly recommend "Lord Heal My Hurts" by Kay Arthur.
Great book.......2007-06-29
I'm half-way through it. So far, it is a really great book w/ super insight. I highly recommend it. Best description for this book would be "lifechanging".
WHAT A GREAT BOOK! .......2007-02-23
This is an outstanding book. This addresses a very real problem and does it in terms we can all understand. It is an easy read and includes enough actual stories from actual people to cross the bounds of "it could never happen to us" Thanks Fred and Brenda!
You are NOT alone!.......2006-09-02
This book has helped me realize that I am not alone and that it is completely NORMAL to have these types of feelings.
Women share their personal stories and feelings in this book. Wisdom is handed out to help you make your own decisions.
One word of caution...personally, it kind of fueled my fire in a way...not sure how to describe it, but it almost gave me more bullets against my husband.
It's not a feel good read by any means, but it is a should read.
Realistic and helpful steps to restoration.......2006-08-27
Understanding why your spouse was stupid enough to become entangled in the porno web is one thing; forgiving him and restoring your relationship is quite another. This book lays it all bare and gives practical counsel that, if followed, will help a woman wanting to accomplish that end.
Some reviewers of this book expressed disappointment with the focus on pornography and masterbation, but I bought it anyway. Adultery begins in the mind. With easy access to internet pornography, thoughts are turned into images. Sexual obsessions have mental, spiritual, and emotional ramifications. Each has to be acknowledged and addressed. This means going back to where it begins. Cut off a weed at its roots and it will die. This is a good book for women who are truly ready to forgive.
Average customer rating:
- single girls guide to marry a man, his kids and his ex wife
- Down to earth advice - too bad she copped out at end
- Good for the girlfriend that is considering becoming a stepmother
- Straight talk for new Stepmoms!
- Great book! Suprisingly Entertaining
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The Single Girl's Guide to Marrying a Man, His Kids, and His Ex-Wife: Becoming A Stepmother With Humor And Grace
Sally Bjornsen
Manufacturer: NAL Trade
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Accessories:
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ASIN: 0451214196 |
Book Description
A funny, honest, and empathetic resource for the novice stepmother, which includes advice on The kids: Adjusting to suspicion, resentment, and biological-parent loyalties; The ex-wife: Living calmly alongside her, whether she's a psycho or the perfect mother; The holidays: Accommodating old family traditions and developing new ones; The sex: Keeping love alive through the kids' bed-wetting and nightmares. Plus an invaluable list of resources, websites, publications, and organizations specifically for the new stepmother.
Customer Reviews:
single girls guide to marry a man, his kids and his ex wife.......2007-10-01
This book gave situations that come up that can happen but not suggestions on how to deal with them. this book didnt do me much good.
Down to earth advice - too bad she copped out at end.......2007-09-06
I wasn't quite sure how to rate this book -- I enjoyed MOST of the book, but, boy, she slung a real doozy at the end, which left me with a bad taste in my mouth. First, the good stuff -- she relates with honesty, frankness, and much-needed humor, the struggles faced by stepmothers, using many examples and stories from her own life. I felt relieved, energized and heartened. I found myself taking myself less seriously and began seeing the big picture, and even laughing at some of my struggles (particularly with the ex-wife). She has a young, hip tone, which was refreshing after some of the "psych-speak" books I had previously read (although at times it seems she's trying a little too hard). BUT -- and this was a big "but" for me -- at the end she basically says the only way to be truly accepted is to have your own child with your new partner. Ugh. I felt like I had been sucker-punched. As a "childless" stepmom, I felt completely diminished, devalued and disrespected. I wanted to yell, "Sally -- not everyone chooses to or WANTS to have a child! Have a little respect!" I have to say that this last chapter and this declaration cheapened the book for me. It made her sound naive and judgmental, not to mention insensitive. I wondered how someone who seemed so "with it" for most of the book could be so "out of it" on this point. I'm just so tired of the "have children, it will solve everything and give you a purpose in life" thing. Too bad she resorted to this tired old answer, especially in this age of inclusion, and recognition of ALL types of families. And too bad her publisher didn't think twice about including it. I am rating the book 3 stars, hoping that she is just young and naive, and wouldn't have written that if she were 40.
Good for the girlfriend that is considering becoming a stepmother.......2007-09-04
I am a single gal who was looking for someone to tell me the issues that I might be inheriting if I take the next step with my boyfriend. This is an informative book of issues to be aware of and reads almost like a novel. I had picked up another stepmother book but it was way to dry and had too much homework that I was not prepared to concur just yet. This was an easy read.
This book was written for people that know they are going to marry a man, his kids and ex-wife or already have - not for people contemplating. It did lack such issues as - things to consider when moving in with each other, how to introduce kids into the relationship, etc. If you are still on the fence, you might consider another book that deals with dating issues and the step between dating and marrying.
Straight talk for new Stepmoms!.......2007-09-03
I am a new stepmom to a six year old girl. She's great, but sometimes, things bother me and I have a hard time putting them into words. This book is like reading my mind. It has helped me so much, and it also makes you realize that feelings you have sometimes are natural and ok...nothing to feel guilty about. All new stepmoms should read this book...even if your husband wasn't married before - if he just had children from a previous relationship, as mine did, a lot of the book will still apply to you as well.
Great book! Suprisingly Entertaining.......2007-08-02
This book really helped me to realize that I'm not the only person that does really stupid step-mom things and then regrets them. It's a great read if you're feeling like no one in the world can possibly understand what you're going through.
Amazon.com
Self-proclaimed "feminist and former shrew" Laura Doyle sets forth a whopper of a game plan for establishing profound intimacy in one's marriage. Building on the gender stereotypes defined by bestselling author John Gray (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus), Doyle seeks to heal the overworked, underappreciated wife who snarls at her mate's every thought or action. Her message to these smart, self-sufficient types: check the nitpicking, the unsolicited opinions, and--egads!--the finances at the marital door (although she says it's still okay to wield control at work). Many women will find such advice archaic and offensive; some will simply laugh off this credential-free anachronism when they receive the book as a bridal-shower gag gift. Still others, identifying with Doyle's profile of a controlling wife, will be curious enough to dabble in her proposed art of "surrendering."
According to Doyle, the wife who chooses to surrender must learn to take care of herself first, overcome the desire to have more power, and abandon the myth of equality. Delving into the personal tales and sisterly advice shared within each chapter's pages, surrendering wives will further note the need to master unsavory phrases like "I can't," and "Whatever you think"--tough to swallow for a generation of women who value their own opinions. While she fully acknowledges that a few bills will go unpaid and a few deadlines or freeway exits will occasionally be missed, she also insists that surrendered wives will encounter less worry and fear, more money, and better sex. Hey, "Whatever you think...." --Liane Thomas
Book Description
This controversial approach to marriage has transformed thousands of relationships, bringing women romance, harmony, and the intimacy they crave.
Like millions of women, Laura Doyle wanted her marriage to be better. But when she tried to get her husband to be more romantic, helpful, and ambitious, he withdrew -- and she was lonely and exhausted from controlling everything. Desperate to be in love with her man again, she decided to stop telling him what to do and how to do it.
When Doyle surrendered control, something magical happened. The union she had always dreamed of appeared. The man who had wooed her was back.
The underlying principle of The Surrendered Wife is simple: The control women wield at work and with children must be left at the front door of any marriage. Laura Doyle's model for matrimony shows women how they can both express their needs and have them met while also respecting their husband's choices. When they do, they revitalize intimacy.
Compassionate and practical, The Surrendered Wife is a step-by-step guide that teaches women how to:
- Give up unnecessary control and responsibility
- Resist the temptation to criticize, belittle, or dismiss their husbands
- Trust their husbands in every aspect of marriage -- from sexual to financial
And more.
The Surrendered Wife will show you how to transform a lonely marriage into a passionate union.
Download Description
In this radical and controversial approach to marriage, Doyle presents "The Rules" for wives, explaining how women can enjoy a passionate sex life, peace instead of tension, and intimacy rather than alienation, by establishing a new balance of sharing, giving, and receiving with their husbands.
Customer Reviews:
Finally! True Feminism!.......2007-06-11
It was such a relief to read this book, especially since I grew up in a household that espoused such wonderful principles. So many people are attracted to the label of feminism that they forget what feminism is supposed to do: give women choices that would be personally fulfilling and lay paths to happiness. Unfortunately, the feminism that many women prefer guarantees women more misery than contentment and more strife than intimacy.
What struck me most about this book is that it is so honest, straightforward and simple. However, I think it's important not to take her words as Gospel or the book as a "Marriage Bible." The author is human, and as such some of her suggestions are merely reflective of her sincere desire to turn her life around, a desire that borders on desperation at moments. This is most likely due to her surrendering being new to her. It is only natural that a person new to something exhibits zeal and goes overboard at times, such it is with Laura Doyle. Her desire to be better is so profound that she doesn't seem to trust herself to exist individually and better herself as a surrendered wife at the same time. However, most likely time and experience will heal these idiosyncrasies in her practice of surrendering.
However, having been married for 11 years and having grown up in a surrendered household, as well as having embraced these principles long before the "liberated woman" found them palatable, I find that true surrender allows you to dismiss these tips/experiences from the author:
1. Only give your opinion when it relates to your desires. (The key here is to give your opinion while keeping your heart ever open to his, and being content with and supportive of what he decides, even if it goes against what you suggested).
2. Give your husband all of your money and resign yourself to asking for what you want. (In my view, true surrender is to allow him to take care of the finances from his money without contributing unless it's for an emergency; a woman's money is hers; a man's money is theirs. That's surrender).
3. Giving up your last name. (You are an individual, a human being with an identity connected to your blood family and lineage, reflected in your last name. Marriage is the uniting of two lineages, not the disposing of yours).
However, these suggestions do not take away from the power of the book. I strongly recommended this book for the women brave enough to better, and thus truly liberate, themselves.
Try It First (put your heart into it).......2007-02-23
Many women are put off by the concept of letting their husband have the upper hand. Letting mine have what he wants within reason is actually quite liberating. If he wants to display his Dale Earnhart flag in the front yard, it's no skin off my teeth, his buddies think it's cool and my buddies know I didn't put it there so what's the big deal? That's just an example but not spending all my time worrying over him (a GROWN MAN) makes my life so much easier. He does as he pleases and I have noticed that without any input from me, we have food on the table, clothes on our backs and a ton of love in the bedroom. When I treat my husband with the love and respect he deserves I get back so much more when I fuss over him. I am putting my trust, faith and confidence in the man I chose to be my husband. I have done many things that this book suggests for years but reading this reminds me to commit myself to being the best wife I can be. I also like that this book is not specifically Christian, Muslim, Jewish...what have you. Read it and give it an honest try before you write a bad review. Remember, feminism means embracing and celebrating a womans ability to make CHOICES. Some of us exercise our right to choose by surrendering and/or being homemakers. Don't hate, just be happy that everyone is different. This lifestyle may not be for everyone. If it's not for you, please go find your bliss and leave us happily surrendered wives alone.
Two Thumbs Up!.......2006-11-29
This book gives you simple tips to help regain intimacy in your marriage. Sometimes we (us women) are just so comfortable the way things are that we forget how GREAT it used to be at the beggining or how wonderful dating was. Well let me tell you I read the book and I'm back to that stage! Your husband really wants to make you happy, but sometimes we just don't let him, we are too controlling, and this ruins intimacy, not only in the sexual way, but the type of intimacy that makes you feel so lucky you have him in your life. Read this book if you feel like you are always controlling everything, or if you feel deprived in any way, or better yet, read it even if your relationship is already okay, I guarantee if you follow the simple steps you will regain the wonderful man you married and most importantly YOU will feel so much better about yourself!
If You Only Buy One Book to Fix Your Husband Or Boyfriend, Buy This One........2006-09-18
I've read a lot of books about dating and choosing who to stay the course with and who to let go of, and how to handle yourself at that level. I'm seeing someone exclusively now, so I moved on from SURRENDERED SINGLE to THE SURRENDERED WIFE. This book has improved my relationship like no other, except for RELATIONSHIP RESCUE, which is totally different and improved other things than THE SURRENDERED WIFE did. These two are my Top 2 I recommend to friends. (I also recommend GETTING TO COMMITMENT if there are any commitment issues on your part or his, coming up at any stage of dating, relationship or marriage.)
There's so much to say about this book, but I'm going to leave this review short. Just get this one.
I mentioned my top 2 relationship books, and I'm going to mention my third favorite. WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES. The title sounds bad, but it's not about being mean; it's helped my relationship, too.
Stop the Exhaustion! Save and Refresh Yourself and Your Marriage Today!.......2006-08-09
Wow! This book is NOT what I expected in the least! I bought this book used through [...]sometime ago. Thinking it was just another "submissive wife" theology filled book, I was only half interested in it, and so it laid in my unsightly, toppling pile of "maybe I'll read it" books for a couple months.
Meanwhile, I continued on in my daily life, much of which includes my husband. I thought we've had a good marriage, inspite of some very difficult times through some substantial struggles. We felt that since we made it through those times together, when others we've seen often do not, we must have a good marrage. However, there has been years of often unspoken disappointment and growing distance between us. We had fooled everyone, most importantly even ourselves. Soon we fell into just a habitual, mundane rhythm to our days, our marriage, our life together. Outwardly, I was pretending things were fine, but inwardly I had began a mantra of "if he would only change _____, I could be happy, we could be purely happy". This began small and progressed until it popped into my thoughts continually through the day. Love, joy, comfort, and peace were no longer words that would color my feelings toward my spouse. Resentment, frustration, bitterness, and anger clouded and reined in my inner heart. I was no longer fooling myself and I no longer was fooling him either.
One day this all just became too much. Or perhaps it was going on 10 years of becoming "too much". In some soul-searching, I began to see myself and my marriage for what it really was and I did not like what I had to see. It was at this time that I picked up, The Surrendered Wife: A Practical Guide to Finding Intimacy, Passion, and Pease with Your Man, from my forgotten pile of paperbacks, flipped open the cover, and began to read. That moment has not only changed my marriage, but also changed who I am, and who I see looking back at me in the mirror each morning. I am amazed!
This book alone cannot change you or your marriage. But what it can do is give you a mirror in your hand and encourage you to look into it. It gives you the tools, the concepts, the ideas, and the inspiration to honestly change what you see into something pure, true, and thriving! This book gives hope and a step-by-step, non-overwhelming way to overcome habits and thought patterns that have made your marriage less than bliss, if not outright miserable. The best part is that all you need is you, an honest, open, and willing-to-see-and-try you! You do not need your husband's willingness to make a life-changing difference. All you need to change how you feel is YOU!
The book is well written, filled with helpful advice, real life experiences, and even a group study guide, if you choose to read with some friends. The format is so skillfully organzied, you really go step-by-step in small and manageable sections. I actually had to resist the urge to read ahead! (I wanted to realize and take action in what I'd read before reading more.) There are few things I would want to change about the book, and even those things are more out of personal preference and marriage experience. Laura Doyle's openness and wit is refreshing and inspiring to weary women. While offering rest and refreshment for the weary, it also gives no-nonsense, secular, clear guidence to make yourself who you want to be.
For years, I had wanted to change just about everything about my husband. I had even dreamt about how it would be if only he was different. For me, after all the many, many things I discovered about myself when reading this book, the surprise was that the only thing I could actually change was me, and then actually coming to realize that. The greatest, most amazing thing was that was all I had to do. It was this book that gave me this realization and the path to do it. Today, I have true intimacy, passion, and peace with my man. We have something that I would never give up. Friends and family have said, "If only I could have what you and your husband have..."...If they only knew what brought us here! May our love, understanding, and respect for one another only continue to grow, and I hope the same may come to life for you! Enjoy!
Book Description
Applying the concepts from his bestseller Sacred Marriage, Gold Medallion award-winning author Gary Thomas reveals what a man needs from his wife to become the husband she wants.
Customer Reviews:
Very helpful male perspective, 4.5 stars.......2007-10-07
This book is a great tool! It helps one identify the ways they might be plowing their field upside down. Developing charity is tough. It takes incredible humility and Gary Thomas has some motivating methods for stirring up our resolve. So, 4.5 stars?
The book has one major controversy. Midway through the book Thomas admits this change in direction by bringing up Madame de Pompadour as a chief model of how to influence one's husband. Only Pompadour uses that influence on the king INSTEAD of her husband. Madame de Pompadour is actually a character one might want to avoid modeling their life after. She, a married woman with 2 children, chose to go and seduce the king of France and crush her husband rather than hold to the principles that would have kept her less famous, yet building her marriage. She became a master of intrigue who won for herself pompous titles and honors of land and a royal burial, but she was just the main course in a continuous buffet of infidelity, never mind what happened to her broken family. She did little more than what any power hungry, spiritually undeveloped woman, fearful to maintain illegitimate ties, might do.
So read that section with blinders off. His point for bringing her up is weak, but it does come across. Treat your husband (except in the case of Madame de Pompedour, conquest) like a king and a you will, more likely than not, be blessed for it. Thankfully, Thomas mentions that model within marriage is still a position of subservience if used as a tool of manipulation. Submissiveness is an entirely different thing. It is done with confidence in Christ's love while subservience is not.
If you can get through that pot hole, the rest of the book does stay on track regarding submissiveness and its role in the salvation of one's family. This is mainly in regards to attitude.
Besides this there are some excellent points in Mr. Thomas' book regarding the role of hormones, such as oxytocin, and how they are used in a man's body to bond him to his wife.
This is a good read. The section on Madame de Pompadour is awkward, but Gary does use other righteous examples of women who secured for themselves splendid honor in their marriages. There is just less of a prominent focus on them because their racy side is left veiled to the public as it should be. Through them he makes a good point: it is an exceptional woman who comprehends her potential in the role that God outlines for her AND, after reading his book, you do come out flipped back over properly and plowing right side up.
Transformational!!!.......2007-09-28
Rather than me attempting to express the depth of insight and wisdom in this book, I decided that Gary Thomas speaking for himself would serve the purpose. The rest of this review comes straight from "Sacred Influence" to your screen :)
Quoted from "Sacred Influence" by Gary Thomas:
"How is God using your marriage to teach you how to love?
When you find yourself in a difficult marriage, or in a basically good marriage with one particular issue that grates on you, you can be sure that God wants to mature you as you face this problem with strength, courage, dignity, and biblical wisdom. God could of course speak the word and your problem would be solved- voila! But that's not how God usually works. He allows us to face issues that may terrify us and make us feel completely inadequate- he may even walk us through our deepest fears- so that we can grow in him.
The Bible is adamant about this. Spiritual growth takes place by persevering through difficult times
...
The good news is that you and God are in this together. He knew, even before he created you, who you'd marry. And he will continue to give you the tools you need to become the person he's called you to be and to do the work he's created you to do within your current relationship. God would never leave you alone in any situation: "He will never leave you nor forsake you" (Deut 31:6). Even if you married a non-Christian, God's grace is sufficient for you. You cannot dig a hole so deep that it cuts you off from God's provision, care, and life-giving strength....
That's the message I want to communicate: you and God are in this together, and he's beginning your marriage makeover with you. Let him transform you as you seek to move your husband. While you may never achieve the results you have in mind, you can- without question- change the equation of your marriage by remodeling yourself. It begins with understanding, perhaps for the first time, the glory of being a godly woman and acting with the strength of a godly woman who understands she was created in the image of God, forgiven of her sins through the work of Jesus Christ, and gifted and empowered by God's Holy Spirit to live the life God has called her to live...
By courageously facing up to the challenges that every marriage faces, and by letting God change you in the process, something wonderful takes place- the formation of a new woman, fully alive to God, who can take the lessons she learns at home and apply them everywhere else.
'We can't guarantee success in this war, but we can do something better. We can deserve it.'"
Slightly stereotypical, but good.......2007-09-02
Gary Thomas is brave to write a book for wives from a male perspective and he does a fairly good job, in my opinion. There are spots where he makes generalizations and the examples of couples he uses are on the sweet and simple side, but he makes some good points. We are either making a good marriage by degrees or tearing one down by degrees. Our identity is in Christ, not our marital status.
I preferred "Sacred Marriage" over "Sacred Influence" by Thomas, but this one did make a good book for a discussion group of wives in my church.
Spectacular!.......2007-07-24
This is definitely worth reading! I wish every married (or soon to be married) woman would read this. Gary Thomas writes TO women, not just at them or for them. I felt very understood and was excited to alter my behavior during and after reading this.I also learned a ton about men in general...and i've been married for 14 years so i am not "new" at this. I am so encouraged! This isn't 5 easy steps to change your man, but a challenge and call to change yourself...the ONLY one you CAN change. The blessing that comes in your marriage from your personal growth is a bonus! It gives great advise from a man's point of view. Isn't that what we all need since we are so different from men? He is caring and respectful but plain and easy to understand. I hope you enjoy it as much as i have. Since i have read this and Sacred Marriage i have gone on to read Gary's other book The Glorious Pursuit...another winner!
Good book, very helpful; some drawbacks.......2007-06-09
I must first and formost admit that this is was a very difficult book for me to read. The TRUTH presented in it hit home like a tone of bricks! I really appreciate Mr. Thomas's point of view and I really like that this book is written from a man's point of view. I really feel like God has chosen me to do a good work in my husband's life. This book has helped me see how I have not been cooperating with God in being a Godly influence to my husband. Here's the thing: I'm not sure I would recommend this book for women who are being neglected or emotionally/physically abused by their husband. Women in this position are in a very delicate state and need to be built up in God and receive a stronger foundation in Him before being able to take a look at themselves throught the lens of this book. There are elements in this book that may inadvertently reinforce a woman's belief that her mistreatment is her doing and her responsibility. A woman's abuse at the hands of her husband is his choice and his choice ALONE. There are so many woman out there who need to be empowered FIRST, before one is able to pick apart their roles in their abusive relationships. There needs to be a greater awareness of this issue and it needs to be addressed more openly in books that deal with the woman's role in the marriage.
Although there was a chapter on husbands who are unsaved, it was not adequate. This kind of union has different needs from a christian union and I felt that this book did not provide this different perspective.
Another bad taste that was left in my mouth after all this was that in my readings of so many of the Christian lit on marriage (including this one), men seem to not be held accountable for ungodly behavior as much as women. Despite this very valuable point of view from Mr. Thomas, it lacks any kind of idea that men should be held accountable for the mistreatment of their wives.
I gave this book four stars because I feel like despite it's drawbacks it has helped me realize that by honoring my husband I'm really honoring God. It is God who requires me to be a good wife to my husband and that fact is paramount to whatever self-centered feelings I may have toward my marriage and my husband. This book defintely helps you to realize how you can be the wife God wants you to be.
Book Description
Bursting with originality and controversy, author Naleighna Kai has created a provocative, and at times heartwarming tale about an age-old problem that will strike a chord with all women.
Every Woman Needs a Wife is the hilarious, but thought-provoking story of a wife who does the "unthinkable." Strolling in on Vernon and his mistress one night, Brandi Spencer insists that the new woman in his life come home and earn her keep the honest way -- on her feet helping the wife clean the house, keep the children and pay the bills, instead of laying on her back servicing the husband.
Tanya Kaufman has had one shock too many -- one minute she's a fiancée, the next she finds out she's been the mistress all along. When Tanya shows up during the surprise anniversary party to take Brandi up on her offer, the women seize the opportunity to teach Vernon that infidelity will no longer come at the expense of the women's time, money, and happiness. Vernon fights back by launching a high-profile court battle that doesn't have a thing to do with splitting the money, keeping the house, or visitation rights.
Had any married couple ever fought for custody of...the mistress?
Customer Reviews:
The Best Revenge!.......2007-09-07
Have you ever had the feeling that the person you loved was cheating on you? Brandi Spencer started to become suspicious of her husband Vernon of thirteen years. Well her suspicions became fact when she decided to follow him one day. She tracked him all the way to his mistress' house Tanya Kaufman. Tanya had no idea that she was a mistress, but thought that she was Vernon's fiancé! Little did Tanya know, her little happy world was about to come crashing down with the knock on the door. When Brandi confronts Tanya and Vernon, her actions surprises her as well. Since Vernon is taking care of Tanya with the money they've worked so hard for, why shouldn't she reap some of the benefits. Things get ugly when Brandi wants full custody of the girls...and the mistress!
Every Woman Needs a Wife is a book I would suggest every woman should read. It'll make you laugh, and there are some parts of the book that gets on the serious side, but all in all it was an excellent book. If you have a vivid imagination, this is the book for you. We all know someone in the same situation as Brandi, Tanya or Vernon. The book keeps your attention from beginning to end, and will have you saying to yourself "Oh no he didn't!!" Every Woman Needs a Wife is a must read!
Reviewed by Jackie
for Urban Reviews
I Love IT!!!!.......2007-08-31
I took a chance and purchased this book after the synopsis intrigued me...Good Move! This book is great! Very real, and it keeps your attention every step of the way. This book is a true page turner and will definitely open your eyes to new horizons. I totally suggest you get this book and experience for yourself. Men & Women should read this novel!
good but slow .......2007-06-27
this book took me sometime to read to actually get in to it but it was a good overall and it had some meaniing to it. when i seen the cover i was kinda scared to read it cuz i thought it was about to females getting it on so i had to read the review over and over again so i could understand the book bu ti liked it happy reading
Oh well!.......2007-06-27
This book was very slow and took me a while to get into.I wouldnt buy it so your best bet would be to pick it up from the library!
Naleighna Kai speaks to reviewers and browsers.......2007-04-03
Greetings all. Thanks so much for taking the time to review this book, one that was written purely as a What if? What if I caught my husband cheating? While unrealistic to some, THIS is exactly what I would do: invite the mistress home to earn her keep on her feet helping me instead laying on her back helping him. Married men seem to have wives all pegged: "The worst she can do is leave me." No, with the writing of this novel, it shows the worst that can happen is that both women team up and the wife can force a judge to make the husband pay for the wife AND the mistress. Now how's that for an original twist? In one of the recent reviews, it was encouraged that you read She Touched My Soul. One of the reasons I'm even posting is because the book, as it stands right now, is not available under any umbrella but used--since it was one of my first writings years ago. Originally self-published, it will eventually be re-released under a major publishing house. But between that time you'll have an opportunity to enjoy Every Woman Needs a Wife, then the next one out the gate: Open Door Marriage and Was it Good For You Too? Now, while I would love to give my own book five stars, I can honestly say that it is a four. My five stars are reserved for my idols: Octavia Butler, L. A. Banks, Mary B. Morrison. At least I'm honest about it, eh? Best to all and happy reading!
Book Description
Here is the comprehensive guide men have been waiting for: the companion workbook to the best-selling book, Every Man's Marriage. Authors Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker believe that every man–whether married or about to be–can meet the secret desire of his wife. The problem is, most of them aren't exactly sure what that desire is and how they can go about fulfilling it faithfully.
By using the Every Man's Marriage Workbook, individually or in a men’s group, readers can discover the common misconceptions about what it means to exercise biblical authority. They can better understand how mutual submission works. They can learn how to properly exercise their biblical role in marriage leadership. And, in the process, they can strengthen and enliven their relationship with their wife.
Every Man's Marriage Workbook guides men through serious Bible study, intense examination of your personal life, and an honest application of biblical truth. In these practical, real-life lessons–easy to use by individuals or groups in eight sessions–readers will find clear teaching, easy-to-follow Bible studies, reflection and discussion questions, real-life case studies, and practical applications.
Customer Reviews:
Great Helpmeet!.......2003-12-04
This book is a great study guide to go along with the book of Every Woman's Desire. What can I say? It's great!
Book Description
A Practical Path to Healing for Wives Facing a Husband’s Sexual Sin.
Connecting emotionally in marriage isn’t easy. Sadly, many men prefer the “false intimacy” found in pornography, lust, and self-pleasure. Some husbands refuse to acknowledge that there is a problem. Others eventually become desperate to break free from their sin.
Yet even if your husband–or your boyfriend, if you are single–is genuinely repentant, you may feel overwhelmed by your own pain. How can you help him rebuild his life when you own has been shattered? Why should you even want to? How can you know when to seek healing for your marriage and when to draw the line? In the Every Heart Restored Workbook, you’ll find answers to these and other crucial questions.
Despite your husband’s betrayal, you can choose a path to growth and healing. Doing so may be the most courageous thing you’ve ever done. It also may launch you on the hardest and richest marriage-related journey yet.
A companion to Every Heart Restored.
Customer Reviews:
Great Resource for seeing Wives Through this Painful Situation.......2007-08-30
I learned of my husbands sin 2+ years ago. We used this book in support group to help wives heal the wounds inflicted by our husbands sin and begin to journey towards restoration. God has used our marriage for his glory as we are today enjoying a marriage free from Sexual Sin.
You don't need Every Heart Restored book to go with it........2007-06-29
I learned after recieving it, that you dont need the workbook as well as the book. It is nice to have both, but not a neccesity. I've gotten about half-way through the book and it has been eye-opening at points.
Not the most supportive book for a wife.......2007-03-12
After my husband read "Every Man's Battle" and found it to be extremely helpful, I bought this book with the hope that I would feel the same level of support. Instead, I often felt as though salt were being rubbed into my wound. In light of several other resources I have used, I feel that this book could be potentially very harmful. It does have some excellent portions. However, I would recommend women start with "An Affair of the Mind," by Laurie Hall.
Book Description
A personal account of marriage to someone with a chronic illness, including humorous and touching anecdotes, and useful advice.
Customer Reviews:
Written so that men will actually read it - doesn't get any better than that!.......2006-12-14
Beyond Chaos is one of the best books for men who have a wife who lives with a chronic illness. A few years after recommending this book to many people I mentioned it to someone who is "a good friend" of the author, Gregg Piburn. She shared with me just how much heart went into this book.
This book is not from the perspective of a "know it all" and "follow my directions." It's written by a humble man who daily feels inadequate for this journey he has been called on to care for his ill wife. His deep love and constant support is obvious, but he still struggles with the feeling that he's put his foot in his mouth one more time.
I think his vulnerability is what makes this book a gem and one that men can actually relate to and find comfort and encouragement in. More books like this need to exist, but time will never make this one any less worthwhile. 10 stars!
Egocentric.......2005-10-29
First of all, I highly commend Mr. Piburn for having the courage to write his story. Although, the further I got into the book, the more egocentric his style of writing became. I felt like many times he was focusing more on how to say things than sharing what was really going on. When I arrived at the part in the book where he expresses that a man has to ejaculate sometimes, I could no longer read this. It sounded chauvinistic to me. As a female partner of someone with chronic pain, I can only say that I'm sure both sexes have a need to experience the release of orgasm. Maybe the book would be more helpful to a male who is the well spouse.
Honestly written!.......2005-10-14
This is one of the best books on how people cope with Fibro that I have read. This man is honest about how he feels and how he struggles in his role as caretaker of an ill spouse. It helped give me insight into what my husband must go through in helping to keep me sane and well as this illness steals both our lives.
Nice, but he must be a saint..........2005-08-29
As the husband of a person with chronic illness, I thought I might find some great insight and perspective that might lead me to a different path of thought or feeling. Didn't happen here.
While I agree that to a large part his attitude is great (almost saintly if you ask me) what I really didn't see in this was someone who really, really was real. While it definitely comes from a unique experience for material in this area, it still leans more toward the standard stuff on the subject.
IMHO, if this is the worst reaction(s) he ever had, then I want what he is taking.
Its a good book, if you have a life more Cleaver then Simpson. Unfortunately, most of us live in another world. Thanks Gregg, for writing the book. Guess I'll have to write one myself...
More Here Than Meets The Eye.......2002-02-19
There is more to Beyond Chaos by Gregg Piburn than meets the eye. Billed as "One Man's Journey Alongside His Chronically Ill Wife", it is not just a story of how one couple dealt with the challenges of chronic illness. It is also a guide to improving your communication skills while exploring motives of self and applying your personal growth
to marriage, parenting and other relationships affected by chronic illness. Gregg Piburn is a management consultant by trade and conducts effectiveness and growth seminars for corporate managers and their teams. He has deftly adapted and applied his skills as a corporate coach to personal challenges. In Beyond Chaos, he covers what he refers to as "The Four Phases" of personal growth people must journey through to a higher level: Pseudo Community (Plastic People), Chaos (Angry People), Emptiness (Vunerable People), Community (Real People). Gregg Piburn describes the emotions and reactions belonging to each phase and real life examples that he, his wife Sherrie and their children experienced along the way. This book definitely operates on more than one level and is more than a guide for "caretakers" or an insightful view of the other side of the chronic illness experience for "patients". Gregg Piburn offers the reader an inside look at how chronic illness changed nearly every aspect of his and wife, Sherrie's life together. And he encourages others dealing with chronic illness to think outside the box, drop limiting labels like "caretaker" and "patient" (italics his, not mine) and challenge yourself to move beyond the frustration, anger and guilt. This is a worthwhile read for all human beings wishing to live at a higher level. Honesty, courage, openness and revelation about the relationship between a healthy spouse and a chronically ill spouse grace this book. Gregg Piburn invites you to expand your emotional horizons and soar above your challenges.
Book Description
In need of new ideas to tell your wife you love her? Use these 365 fun and creative ways to show your wife how you feel about her.
Customer Reviews:
A great idea for every day!.......2007-05-16
This little book has a great idea for every day! After you order this, be sure to check out The Man of Her Dreams The Woman of His! and The Man of Her Dreams The Woman of His 2 - Livin' It and Lovin' It! (Volume 2)
Joel and Kathy Davisson
Books:
- The Periodic Table
- The Reef Aquarium: A Comprehensive Guide to the Identification and Care of Tropical Marine Invertebrates (Volume 1)
- The Reivers
- The Right Attitude to Rain: An Isabel Dalhousie Novel (Isabel Dalhousie Mysteries)
- The Ruby in the Smoke (Sally Lockhart Trilogy, Book 1)
- The Satyricon (Meridian Classics)
- The Secret Garden (HarperClassics)
- The Servant: A Simple Story About the True Essence of Leadership
- The Story of the World Volume 2: History for the Classical Child (Story of the World: History for the Classical Child (Audio))
- The Theory of Investment Value (Contrary Opinion Library)
Books Index
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