Book Description
For ages women have come together over coffee, cocktails, or late-night phone chats to analyze the puzzling behavior of men.
He's afraid to get hurt again.
Maybe he doesn't want to ruin the friendship.
Maybe he's intimidated by me.
He just got out of a relationship.
Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo are here to say that -- despite good intentions -- you're wasting your time. Men are not complicated, although they'd like you to think they are. And there are no mixed messages.
The truth may be He's just not that into you.
Unfortunately, guys are too terrified to ever directly tell a woman "You're not the one." But their actions absolutely show how they feel.
HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU -- based on a popular episode of Sex and the City -- educates otherwise smart women on how to tell when a guy just doesn't like them enough, so they can stop wasting time making excuses for a dead-end relationship.
Reexamining familiar scenarios and classic mind-sets that keep us in unsatisfying relationships, Behrendt and Tuccillo's wise and wry understanding of the sexes spares women hours of waiting by the phone, obsessing over the details with sympathetic girlfriends, and hoping his mixed messages really mean "I'm in love with you and want to be with you."
HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU is provocative, hilarious, and, above all, intoxicatingly liberating. It deserves a place on every woman's night table. It knows you're a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better. The next time you feel the need to start "figuring him out," consider the glorious thought that maybe He's just not that into you. And then set yourself loose to go find the one who is.
Download Description
He's Just Not That Into You is provocative, hilarious, and, above all, intoxicatingly liberating. It deserves a place on every woman's night table. It knows you're a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better. The next time you feel the need to start "figuring him out," consider the glorious thought that maybe He's just not that into you. And then set yourself loose to go find the one who is.
Customer Reviews:
I should have written this book!.......2007-10-07
Many years ago the term was "GU (geographically undesireable)". I always said that if you lived 500 miles away and a man was into you, he'd make the trip and if you lived next door and he wasn't into you, it'd be too far to go. I never bought or read this book as I thought the male author was just pompous and sarcastic about women. But, read it in a waiting room and got to laugh out loud and enjoyed the style and bluntness of the responses (even if the letters were made up). I have always wondered why women can be intelligent, attractive, interesting and interested but, when a man walks into her life (or into the room or into view of her), she becomes willing to settle for whatever crumbs he throws her way. Even in a work environment, women support men over women! Wake up ladies, they don't give up their friends or lives for us. Why do we feel we must? (No, not ALL of us, but damn near all!).
Ladies, heed Greg & Liz's advice!.......2007-09-29
This audio book is pure genious! It's straight-shooting, blunt, and full of "tough love" which hopefully will knock some sense into those of us who hang on to guys way too long hoping things will "get better". It's an easy listen, because you know it speaks to you. You will truly feel that Greg & Liz are your caring friends or siblings when you listen to their advice. I only wish Greg's live comedy show incorporated some of the material in the book, rather than the endless vulgarity he seems to think is necessary to be funny in a live performance. Stick to writing books, Greg! That's where your true talent is...
Ouch! But True!.......2007-09-19
What I like most about this book is that it doesn't allow any wiggle room for excuses. (My excuses *love* wiggle room.) The truth isn't always fuzzy but it certainly sets me free.
It's freeing for me to know that I'm strong enough to deal with the truth. Because life goes on - fabulously well - whether or not he calls. I think this book makes women stronger. No more skirting the issues. Walk tall. Besides we look a lot more attractive that way!
Marginal, obvious advice for women in denial........2007-09-08
It's hard to believe there is a market for this book. I considered it so bad I wasn't even going to drag it over the public library and donate it. I was ready to pitch this book into the garbage after only half an hour of reading, but I struggled on over several weeks, reading little bits at a time thinking perhaps I just wasn't appreciating the book's attempts at New York humor.
The marginal advice filling it still doesn't seem worth the effort of carrying the book two blocks to the library. Its success must be a symptom of how confusing the role of the modern, liberated feminist in America has become? I suppose the book is based on the folklore that "love blinds." How else could perfectly sensible women be so confused as to not see the obvious? This is a book for women who are blind, in denial, desperate, confused, dumb, from Venus, totally inexperienced, spending too much time in psychoanalysis, spending too much time rationalizing everything some guy they think they want to marry says or does to the point of reaching a hopeful conclusion when all the facts say the opposite.
Save your money. The "Dear Abby, Annie, Beth, etc." columns in most newspapers provide much better advice than this lightweight tome that was probably only quickly written to separate a lot of very confused and naive women from their hard-earned money. Don't over-analyze men. Like politicians don't pay any attention to what they say unless it happens to match how they act. Men are pretty uncomplicated as a group. Women who spend hours dissecting them over lunch with their girlfriends can't even be certain the people providing them support don't have a different agenda as far as their success in love is concerned. If you want to know more about men, talk to your mother and lots and lots of men friends who aren't just interested in getting into your panties and then with their curiosity satisfied, are ready to move on to the next challenge. Male co-workers or acquaintances are much better sources of advice than this book.
This volume really wasn't worth this much time to review, but since so many readers seemed to think it contains "Insights from Heaven" I think they've got their directions confused. At best the information provided is so obvious that a child should be able to recognize it. Much of the more complicated advice is bull, or seems like it might have come from a laughing, horned and hoofed creature residing in a place far away from Heaven and hotter than the planet Venus.
This book is CLASSIC! .......2007-09-06
A must read for every smart woman! Another great book that I love and recommend - How to be a Super Hot Woman: 339 Tips to Make Every Man Fall in Love with You and Every Woman Envy You
Book Description
Everyone can use a daily wake-up call.
Now in bite-size mantras, the abridged empathetic wit and wisdom of the number one New York Times bestseller He's Just Not That Into You will recharge and inspire your dating outlook one wake-up call at a time.
For ages women have come together over coffee, cocktails, or late-night phone chats to analyze the puzzling behavior of men. Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo are here to say that -- despite good intentions -- you're wasting your time. Men are not complicated, although they'd like you to think they are. And there are no mixed messages.
The truth may be, He's just not that into you.
He's Just Not That Into You -- based on a popular episode of Sex and the City -- educates otherwise smart women on how to tell when a guy just doesn't like them enough, so they can stop wasting time making excuses for a dead-end relationship. This book knows you're a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better
Customer Reviews:
Productive Reminders.......2007-09-04
I loved this little book and I think it's very useful as a wake-up call on a daily basis. Intellectually the book's thesis that tryint to read between the lines is futile in a dating context is very simple - however since this acvtivity is emotionally fraught one is likely to selectively ignore such sensible advice. I think this rhyme heps as well!
A man who doesn't call
Or simply finds he can't
Is not a man at all
That I would ever want!
Greatest Book For All Women!! A Must Read!!.......2007-08-31
As a former private investigator, when I purchased this book, I was a bit curious as to what this book would say. When I read it, and saw just how brutally honest and straight forward Greg was in telling women the TRUTH about everything, I was plesantly surprised and appreciative that a MAN would dare to be that bold and that honest about things. I urge any teenager, woman or man to read this book for any pre-dating, divorce or widowed circumstance if they are thinking of entering the dating world. Greg said things that I myself have been telling clients in domestic cases for years!!
wake up girls.......2007-08-23
I think Greg offers very good advice in this book. Girls, ditch those losers! You deserve better and Greg will help you see the truth about those obnoxious, careless, what about me guys out there. Read this if you are having doubts about your man or always end up with guys that are losers. Greg sheds light on behavior and what it means.
your daily wake up call.......2007-07-06
This book was funny in some ways and serious in others. It certainly makes you think about stuff that is for sure. I bought it just to see what it was about and some of the sayings caught my attention. A great book if you have just broken up in a relationship or thinking of breaking up...it will make you think.
Great Book For Singles!!.......2007-06-02
I have really enjoyed reading this book. I read alittle each night especially if I am alittle down at the end of the day or a man has said something that has ticked me off, then I read a few pages and it all makes sense as to why he said what he said! LOL I would recommend this book to every woman that has been through a bad break up or divorce especially DIVORCE!! I love Greg for writing this I could hug him! It is a real pick me up or it is a real wake up call for a woman that could be in the dark as to why men are the way they are or as to why we act like we do with men, it's because He's Just Not That Into You! LOL
Book Description
Bestselling author John T. Molloy delivers a groundbreaking book based on scientific research that shows women how they can improve their chances of getting married. John T. Molloy's research has helped women get ahead in the corporate world for years. In fact, his methods have worked so well that many women began asking how to apply these same techniques to get ahead in their personal lives-specifically to find and marry Mr.Right. This book is the result of over 2000 interviews with married couples and over 1,800 unmarried men and women. Molloy's remarkable study reveals:- exactly what women need to do to make their boyfriends pop the question - the top signs a relationship is bound for the altar-or bound for disaster - how to identify which men are the 'marrying kind' and which definitely are not - and much more. WHY MEN MARRY SOME WOMEN AND NOT OTHERS will turn frustrated bachelorettes everywhere into blushing brides!
Customer Reviews:
This book is RIGHT. I'm sure it works. .......2007-01-03
I bought this book, determined to follow the advice and get my own husband. As I read it though, I realized that I didn't want a husband bad enough to do the simple, normal things required to get one. I follow the recipe for staying single, almost to the letter. That's why I have been single from the time I was 18 until now and I am 53, almost 54. You get that book and then after you read it, either do what it says to do and get married, or keep on doing what you're doing now and quit griping cause you're single - just like I had to.
An old ex friend of mine followed the advice without fail. She was married within one year. Two years later, they're still sparkling with pleasure in their relationship. :))
I am AMAZED at the negative feedback. They're shooting the messenger because they don't like the message. Their feedback tells a lot more about them, than it does about the book.
Good Book.......2006-11-30
I thought this book was really good. It puts a lot into perspective for single women in their late 20's and early 30's who truly want to get married. I do NOT think this book is for the ones who want to RE-marry. I'm sure finding "another" husband is a little different the second time around because you're divorced, not "never married." The book helped me identify a string of men who I have dated in the past and helped me to understand the stringers, etc. I think the stages of a relationship is very important as well. It provides a blue print for relationships. I do believe that women who have a nice appearance and are attractive do have better luck because they have a wider pool of potentials. I also believe that you have to be committed to the idea and really put yourself in a place to meet eligible men. I also think this book provides reasons that most men do not reveal. As in "why didn't they call?" Most women wonder why and begin calling the guy and making fools of themselves as opposed to chalking it up as "you didn't live up to his expectations." And there's nothing wrong with that because women do it all of the time. It's about reaching mutual expectations.
I'm 31, successful, highly educated, beautiful (or so I'm constantly told) and have finally decided and committed to the idea that I want to get married. Based on the books advice, I have identified some potentials and discarded the rest (the ones I would have normally kept) and I will let you know how it goes.
Statistically Speaking.......2006-09-25
John Malloy teaches women how to find the right man using valid stats and information. A very good tool, not that much fun to read, however.
Catering to the Man?.......2006-07-28
I found this book a bit old-fashioned. I just turned 40, was married once, and have been in the dating scene for 5 yrs now-- still single with no long-term (more than a year) dating companion. However I'm discouraged that if one of the only ways a single over 40 woman has a chance of finding a mate is being THIN, then I probably dont want to get married ANYWAY. (I'm still attractive, but on the plumper side- 5'10, 219) I want to find a book, instead that focuses on how to help "older" women find love by loving themselves and focusing on their INNER beauty. Look at all those gorgeous BBW's and BBW dating sites out there. The movement is growing because so many more Americans are having problems. There are men who will love you for who you are-- if not, then someone needs to work on re-socializing them in the early stages to assure better partnerships for everyone in the future. Sorry, but after 40, we women start to fade a bit...its GREAT to stay as healthy as possible, but this book is unrealstic.
Read it, understand it and then judge it.......2006-06-08
It seems nobody has reviewed this book for a couple of years with a basic understanding of what it's about.
It's a guide to help get a man to marry you. It's based on research of the "market research" variety, which is good enough for selling Coke and Ford and should work for selling relationships (which most people want more than they want a car - most people seem to want cars to get a relationship). It's written in an informative but light-hearted way.
A lot of people in these reviews don't like the book (some who've only read a few pages). My contributions to the war:
Firstly, the book is for women who want to get married - if you don't want to get married (or at least not any time in the next 5 years) don't read it.
Second - it's qualitative research. That means you don't need big numbers you just need the right people - and he has both the right people and the numbers.
Third - weight takes up less than 1 of the 200 pages. Another is dedicated to why 20% of never-married women in their 40s would do it the same all over again. There's actually more space spent on how to maximise your chances with good-looking men than there is on weight. And that doesn't include looking good yourself.
Is the advice obvious? Well, a lot of it is straightforward. But some isn't. The reviewer who said they needed to be 26 before getting married missed the point - the majority of men need to be that age (or older if they've been to college) before they seriously think about marriage. Do their spouses? No - so if you're a 20-year-old-woman planning on finding a spouse not a boyfriend, check out the 25+ crew.
And to those good-looking women who thought the book had nothing to say to them - please read the other 199 pages. To the plump, sassy crowd - please read the other 199 pages. The biggest drawcard isn't looks.
In summary - it's good advice with sound research behind it. It's not for everyone 'cause not everyone wants to get married in the near future. But if that's you, you probably couldn't do better than this as a guide to hooking him.
Average customer rating:
- Useful, practical and fun....
- great book
- Great Read, and not just about Sex
- very helpful
- It's about love
|
To Bed or Not To Bed: What Men Want, What Women Want, How Great Sex Happens
Vera Bodansky , and
Steve Bodansky
Manufacturer: Hunter House
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
 Love & Romance
| Relationships
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Self-Help
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Sex
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Sex Instruction
| Sex
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Health, Mind & Body
| Subjects
| Books
Similar Items:
-
Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts : Using the Power of Pleasure to Have Your Way with the World
-
The Great Sex Secret
-
Mama Gena's Marriage Manual: Stop Being a Good Wife, Start Being a Sister Goddess!
-
Mama Gena's Owner's and Operator's Guide to Men
-
How to Tell a Naked Man What to Do: Sex Advice from a Woman Who Knows
ASIN: 089793461X |
Book Description
The differences between the sexes create both fun and tension. Most men want sex, either with a new or current partner. Women want sex, too, but are trained to put up obstacles so as not to seem "easy." To Bed or Not to Bed presents specific information on how to use these differences to create more pleasure and intimacy in bed and elsewhere. The authors provide proven sexual and sensual methods used successfully with their clients, including over 20 exercises, some to be done alone and others with a partner. The book takes readers on a journey that leads not just to the bedroom, but ultimately to a better relationship by showing how to take advantage of special techniques that bring a couple years of pleasure and happiness together.
Customer Reviews:
Useful, practical and fun...........2007-08-29
I want to preface this review by saying that I'm not an easy reviewer, especially when it comes to books in this genre. As we know, sex has been around for millions of years and there is probably one book written for each year that contains more of the same kind of information.
This book is practical, fun and takes the form of a self or couple-driven inquiry. It explores a lot of territory including the ins and outs of male and female orgasm, communication between the sexes and the role of intimacy. While I don't necessarily agree with all of the information "between the covers".... the pun is totally intentional... I think it has enough very good material to warrant a 4 or 4.5. It didn't quite reach the 5 category for me, but others certainly seem to feel it belongs in that space.
I believe you will like the sexual tips on pleasing a woman, creating intimacy, communicating about desires and creating the right emotional and psychological climate for great sex. Even if you pick up a few good ideas, laughs and tips... the book will certainly be worth the small cost.
great book.......2007-08-22
an awesome book on how to get the most out of intimacy with your partner. Helps take it up a notch! Read it to your man so he knows exactly how to please you, hey if he understands it you'll like him more.
Great Read, and not just about Sex.......2006-11-21
I found this a very easy to read book packed with wisdom about relationships and sex. There's a lot of insight into what Vera and Steve share ... if you take the time to absorb it. I've taken classes about the male/female dynamic, and have seen some of this material before, but this time, I understood some of the points in a new way. I suggest it for anyone in a relationship as they share some tips we all can benefit from!
I highly recommend it, and working with them. Their experience has helped me expand the pleasure in my life.
very helpful.......2006-08-06
this is an east to read yet astonishingly packed with important info. if more men and women read it there would be a lot more fun on this planet and the divorce rate would be significantly lowered. loved the part about everybody winning.
It's about love.......2006-04-30
This book is easy to read yet has great life-impacting information. i just loved it and has made my life musch more fun and easier to relate with my boyfriend. Our sex is way better and we have given up so many old hang-ups that were preventing us from realizing how much in love we are. the book is worth 10 stars and i recommend it to all my girlfriends.
Average customer rating:
- are we not men?
- Duty Now more than ever
- Raed the last 2/3
- **WARNING** UN-AUTHORIZED BIOGRAPHY!!!
- Too Much Still Unwritten
|
Are We Not Men? We Are Devo!
Jade Dellinger , and
David Giffels
Manufacturer: SAF Publishing
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
Rock
| Composers & Musicians
| Arts & Literature
| Biographies & Memoirs
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Biographies & Memoirs
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Music
| Entertainment
| Subjects
| Books
Rock
| Musical Genres
| Music
| Entertainment
| Subjects
| Books
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Devo - Live 1980
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Devo - The Complete Truth About De-Evolution
ASIN: 0946719497 |
Book Description
With flowerpots on their heads, distinctive post-Kraftwerk imagery, and staggeringly catchy electro-pop riffs, Devo carved an '80s niche setting them apart from the mish-mash of punk, new wave and rock surrounding them. Dellinger interviewed band members and asso-ciates, ransacked their archives to provide illustrations, memorabilia and rare photographs documenting Devo's entire career, and re-evaluated their complete works to provide the most -exhaustive survey of the Devo phenomenon.
Customer Reviews:
are we not men?.......2006-11-12
This album just keeps getting better with age. A must have for any collection.
Duty Now more than ever.......2006-07-09
The authurs are very opinionated and they simply stop writing about what happened in the Devo story after the 3rd album. As a fan of Devo's Freedom of Choice era I find it sad the book ends when the bands success takes off and skims over the troubles with Warner Brothers, making the videos, downfall and Re-Evolution into TV and movie soundtracks at Mutato Muzika. There is a lot of information by former friends who have an ax to grind. Having said that there is a lot to learn about the early hardcore Devo recordings and the philosophy behind the band. Recomended until a documentary or better band history comes along.
Raed the last 2/3.......2005-04-18
The book is divided up in three sections: Head, Body, and Tail. The "head" section was very boring and hard to read. I put the book down for about 6 months, trying to get through this section. Once I got to "body" and "tail," the book flew. I found it very interesting, being a Devo fan from when I first saw them on Sat. Night Live, through New Traditionalists. Being from the Cleveland/Akron area, I also liked all the local references.
**WARNING** UN-AUTHORIZED BIOGRAPHY!!!.......2004-07-20
Having researched the band DEVO on several other occasions, I found it quite odd that most of the quotes from the band, I had actually read elsewhere. It initially made me wonder if the author had actually interviewed the band at all.
It wasn't until today when I read on the official DEVO site (www.clubdevo.com) that in Jerry Casale's very own words that it was IN FACT, an unauthorized biography. Here is what Jerry had to say:
"...the book was done without our approval or co-operation (most of the quotes were extracted from pre-existing sources and the short "interview" with me was done under a different pretext) .The book is loaded with mis-information, delusional distortions and outright lies perpetrated by people with axes to grind. The result is that the significance of the creative process that spawned the almost 100 songs that Mark and I wrote and the excitement of the concepts and aesthetic influences behind our stage shows, costumes and videos gets trivialized and even buried by petty and spiteful politics. These politics are perpetrated by people who often times weren't even involved in the events they spin so far afield but their spin is never-the-less swallowed by the book's writers hook line and sinker. Some day soon we will release another book that sets the record straight on what it meant to be DEVO. -- Gerald Casale."
Aside from all of this, even when I thought it was an authorized release, I found the author repeating information in a very unnecessary way. At least three times does he mention that Mark had an obsession with the Beatles. And he doesn't just mention it, he goes into depth about it. This was another thing that made me wonder if they were just short on material.
The cover I found a little boring, and not well-designed. Another warning that I did not heed.
I'm very disappointed that I actually paid money for this book, not to mention spending hours pouring over it. I would highly recommend passing this one by, as it would be a terrible waste to support the fools who wrote it.
Too Much Still Unwritten.......2004-06-21
I was pretty disappointed in this book. I used to just love these guys back in high school, but this book doesn't go far enough. I was 3/4 of the way finished before I got to the days when they made it big. Too much on Jerry's early days, a lot of Jerry everywhere! As usual, the Bobs, especially Bob 2, and Alan are in the back somewhere, and you wonder what's up with them. Nothing revealing, other than Bob 2 apparently left his wife when they began to hit it big, Bob 1 was a drinker, and Jerry is an even bigger creep than I imagined. Some good details into the first "video" and who some of the people in them were, but nothing on the videotapes with Rod and Donut. No mention of Laraine Newman, their fascination with donuts and pirates, how their politics always seemed so leftist yet they just wanted to make big bucks and now run Big Entertainment companies, etc etc. Nothing about the concept of the power domes, who the fat kid on the exercise machine was, Bob 1's daughter being on the Shout LP cover, so much is left out. Some good pics, but I'm sure more could have been dug up. Sounds like the authors did most research via telephone interviews. They talked to General Boy, but I did that back in the 80s, when a friend and I rang him up on the phone! We lived in Ohio then and both Robert and his wife would chat with us like we were old friends! I'm mixed. There are some great old insights and pieces of trivia, but it really could have been longer and told more about the 80s and on. Devotees should get it because nothing else is there, but be prepared to feel like you've had a delicious appetizer without dinner.
Later thoughts: The book that Devo was so fascinated with, "The Beginning Was The End" and the basis for their De-evolution theory, has anyone else read it? I found a copy and it's wretched. The author uses photos to compare blacks with various apes! Why were they so interested in this book?! And I forgot about Jerry's "I was standing there was my friend was killed" story. According to the book he stretches the truth quite often. So was he there or is he making this up too? I agree with another reviewer that said he would be basically pushing up daisies before listening to the last couple of albums! The first two were great, the rest, a few good songs, but popish. Musik for Insomniaks bored me silly, I can see where it got the title. This book may be out of print after this run, so pass it around like a Casale galpal!
Product Description
In life you never really know when you might meet someone who will change your life. And more importantly you never know when your influence might change another. This book is about influence. It is about a man who lived in a simple place but had extraordinary insight. He also had something else on his side. He had time; time to invest himself in the life of another who was lost on his journey. This story is based on the thousands of athletes I have counseled and the great mentors and teachers from whom I have learned. I have brought my twenty plus years of peak performance coaching together and compressed them into a story of two fictitious characters; a rancher with a passion for teaching truth and a young golf professional at the end of his rope. They represent each of us in the various stages of growth. For in life we must be willing to coach and be coached, either one alone will leave us empty.
Customer Reviews:
This Book Is A Life Changer.......2007-09-27
I've loved reading from a very youg age. I'm now 60 years old. I have read comic books, text books, even read most of the World Book Encyclopedia one summer while I was in junior high. I have read junk and some of the classics. I have read self-help books and most of all, I have read much of the Bible, but I have never read a book that has made such an impact on my life as Golf's Sacred Journey. (And it even helped my golf game.)
This book transformed my game........2007-06-16
Life is NOT a game. There are things way more important than golf, like my relationship with God through Christ. And the opportunity to use this great game and this great book to share my faith in Christ. As I often say on the course, "I love this game!" and I love Jesus more than ever.
Greatest Golf Book Ever.......2007-05-15
I have read a number of golf psychology books. This is by far the best. I would recommend it to my golfing buddies, but I don't want them to learn the lessons of this book. I need the income from our $2 bets.
Book Description
Journalist Steven Bereznai — presentable, accomplished, well educated, successful, and in his early 30s — has never had a boyfriend. “Is Singlesville my final destination?” Bereznai wonders. Or does a partner await? And what does he really want? To pair up, or to maintain the independence of a single life? Now in Gay and Single . . . Forever?, Bereznai investigates the basic question of whether there can be acceptance for him and other single gay men—as single men—where the push to partner with a man has replaced the pressure to marry a woman.
Bringing together a perfect mix of personal narrative, historical research, interviews with dozens of gay men — including Andrew Holleran, Michael Bronski, and Wayson Choy — and intensely penetrating social and psychological insight, Gay and Single . . . Forever? will resonate deeply among gay men —many of whom, even today, spend most of their lives not in a relationship.
Customer Reviews:
Not a practical book for the single guy.......2007-07-26
Sorry, this book wasn't for me. I gave it a chance, but its language just didn't reach out to me. But mostly, it just wasn't practical enough for me. There were interesting stories shared, like the one where the "friends with benefits" guy actually steps up and helps the author paint in a moment of crisis. Don't get me wrong, that was really sweet. There were a few moments like that.
But I'm newly single and trying to figure out how to date, and this didn't help me do that. I was looking for bulleted lists. Checklists. Nuts and bolts. Succinct and discrete steps. I didn't get that.
LOOKING FOR LOVE....or not.......2007-01-27
Bereznai, Steven, Gay and Single...Forever?: 10 Things Every Gay Guy Looking for Love (and Not Finding It) Needs to Know. Avalon 2006
Wow!!!!!!! That is a title for you. Here in this original, quite brave and easily arguable book comes a formula on what and what not to do about being single. The thesis concerns whether it is better to be single or not. It seems that since we became "liberated" after Sonewall, after the marches on Washington and after the multitude of changes in attitudes toward us, that gay men are opting to be, shall we say, unattached. Yet, on the other hand, there is a great deal being said about being partnered. Bereznai examines the issues of whether there is room for a single gay guy in today's modern society. He does this by interviews with gay men, through personal revelations and with detailed commentary based on both psychological and social thought. He wrote this book for us, and especially for the man who wants to stay single.
Berenzai starts off by telling us that the talk of gay marriage and being partnered, which has been such a hot topic of conversation, is "whimsy" as long as there are so many more important issues facing us. Yet essentially the struggle today is for equality--the enemy has not changed--it is still hate and fear. In other words, it is the same old war, just the battles are different.
This book is the result of a search for intimacy at a time when "gay singles are the new pariahs". (Interesting thought). Bereznai uses his own state of perpetual singledom as he sets out to explain his work. And what he has discovered while being single releases his thoughts about the needs of gay men and thereby gives a chronology of the shifting of relationships and how this has affected the cultural and political life of the entire gay community. His writing is heartfelt and witty at the same time. Although he writes from the heart, he doesn't ignore the mind or the other parts of the body. His remarks are "right on", sometimes so true that they hurt. This is a book for all those who live without love but want it very badly. There are times that I felt I was reading Carrie Bradshaw's column. One critic has called this book the "new gay bible". It certainly will help you understand why you never brought the lucky guy home to meet the folks.
Allow me to share some of the chapter titles with you. We start off with "Gay is good--being gay and single used to be, too". How about "Husbands and boyfriends don't guarantee happiness" and "Boyfriends can be like prostitutes---Prostitutes can be like boyfriends". And then there is my favorite, "Wanting to be with someone is natural....not wanting to stay with him is, too" Paul Rudnick, the gay playwright is quoted on the back cover, "Being gay and single is the new smoking. It won't be socially acceptable anymore, and you will have to go outside." That pretty well sums the book up.
Highly recommended.......2006-11-15
This book gave me a new perspective on life. Being gay and single most of my adult life I felt a sense of guilt when not in a relationship. Bereznai analyzes some of the reasons why westernized culture puts pressure on everyone, including gay men, to be a couple. His writing is both funny, intelligent and inspiring. I highly recommend this book to any gay man that is having guilt over not being in a relationship.
A book that tells it like it is........2006-10-28
When I first started reading 'Gay and Single....Forever?' I wanted others to read it. I then thought that my coupled friends wouldn't understand it so why tell them about it. When I finished it I wanted to give a copy to all my friends that are in a string of never ending long term relationships and say, "you want to know what it is like being me? - read this book!"
Steven Bereznai touched upon so many things that you don't talk about with your coupled friends so you think that you are the only one experiencing them. He has so many of the same memories and experiences that I myself have had, it was uncanny at times. I have read other books about Cultures of Desire and Male Couple guides, and many had some interesting points, but I related to this book from start to finish. It was very hard to put down.
As I began reading, I found there were many things I wanted to highlight, as I do when I am reading a book or article for work, but I felt that it would be absurd to use a yellow highlighter on a book I was reading for pleasure. I decided to just turn down the corner edge on a page where I read a phrase of interest. By the end, I had marked so many pages, because there was a phrase or paragraph that hit home, that half the corners of the book are now turned down.
There should be discussion groups set-up to discuss this book and I'd be the first to sign-up.
What a great read!
Very thorough!.......2006-10-07
This book is one of the most thorough works of the existing literature around on gay men and relationships. The author has done an excellent job researching romantic love and the love lives of gay men and why so many are still single. Without pathologizing single gay men or the gay male community he presents a balanced and objective viewpoint of why so many gay men stay single. Hopefully this will end any shame single gay men might feel and take on all the blame!
Customer Reviews:
Well researched, well reasoned, and utterly unconvincing........2004-12-22
I spent a fair amount of effort looking for some reasoned writing against same-sex marriage, as it seems that most of the research in the debate is on the "for" side, with only politicians and opinion columnists publishing "against". Grenz's book goes a long way towards filling that niche; he carefully considers the biblical, historical, and pastoral arguments both for and against, and draws a reasonable conclusion from his data. I have two major objections to Grenz: first, we weigh the data differently; he dismisses arguments that I find to be of utmost importance-he has, for example, not read John Boswell's second book, _Same-Sex Unions in Premodern Europe_, which reputedly addresses many of the historical issues he raises in dismissing Boswell's first book, _Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality_ (mind, this is reputation only, as I have yet to acquire a copy of either book-though I have read several reviews of both, one set of which is re-printed in Andrew Sullivan's anthology, _Gay Marriage Pro and Con_), and gives what I would consider undue weight to the social construction theory of sexuality. Second, his conclusions are valid for a Baptist minister considering what pastoral stance to take on the issue of homosexuality; he never addresses what political stance should be taken. Of course, he is also Canadian, so I would have distrusted anything he said about American politics anyways.
A recent contribution to the debate.......2003-06-30
I welcome Stanley Grenz' book 'Welcoming but not Affirming' for several reasons:
(1) Each generation has, it seems, the defining touchstone debates in Christianity, that seem to reach to the core of religious practice and community (interesting that subsequent generations rarely sustain the emotional importance attached to those issues of previous generations). In the current generation, acceptance or rejection of homosexuality is one of these (I would say abortion and the status of women are the other two). Grenz, a noted theologian, tackles this issue directly.
(2) Because of the emotional level that such touchstone debates reach to, there is often a tendency to sacrifice scholarship and reasonable dialogue to diatribe and immovable pronouncements, on both sides. Grenz presents a fairly balanced view with his own bias present in the title of the work.
(3) This is a book that will make both sides of the debate variously comfortable and uncomfortable. That in itself is a positive, because it will spur people on to thinking and reflection. A mature faith requires examination, in my opinion.
These things having been said, I have a few criticisms of the book. In the first half, Grenz presents what his view is of the welcoming and affirming side, i.e, those who argue for full acceptance of same-sex unions and open ordination of gays and lesbians. Grenz tends to concentrate only on the same-sex union aspect of this, and Grenz does a pretty good job at this, although there is every so often the tendency I think to make the arguments into a straw figure he can later torch. I would have preferred a little more development of the opposing side, so the arguments weren't so easily refuted.
In his refutation and presentation of his openly-stated bias (that of welcoming, but not affirming, i.e., welcoming the homosexual as a human being, but still viewing that homosexuality as a sin that should not be affirmed), Grenz also lacks a little in the argumentation. Grenz does use scripture well, and avoids many of the pitfalls that both sides often seem to fall into. However, I would have to wonder just how welcome a homosexual would be in this church. While not denying that gays or lesbians can be Christian and receive the Holy Spirit (Grenz is an evangelical himself), he still falls into the trap of not being able to explain why certain scriptural prohibitions are important while others are not.
However, far be it for me to criticise anyone for not being able to settle this debate! I am far from being able to do it myself.
A "welcome" addition to the controversial conversation.......2000-03-02
At last we have a sane, moderate, compelling voice taking the "traditional" (but not reactionary) viewpoint, that homosexuality can be compassionately discussed and homosexual persons compassionately ministered to, without wholesale affirmation of their orientation and behavior as God's will for their lives. To demonstrate this book's credibility in the conversation now going on within Christian circles, James Nelson, an articulate theologian with a "gay-affirmiing" viewpoint, adds his highest recommendation. There is nothing "homophobic" in Stanley Grenz's approach, and as an eminent ethicist, he is not writing a moralistic diatribe. His is a reasoned and refreshing antidote to the more strident "right-wing" denunciations of homosexual sin, yet he maintains the clear and unequivocal position, based upon the overwhelming consensus of scripture and tradition, that the Christian faith does not and cannot affirm gay and lesbian behavior, nor same-sex unions, as "normative" or "alternative" lifestyles within the church. That the church should support the "civil" rights of homosexual persons, there can be no doubt, but the church cannot extend a "blessing" in the same manner as it does to marriage. Gay friendships, even when most exemplary of fidelity and longevity, are not, nor should they be construed as analogous with, the marriage of a man and a woman. The only missing dimension to the book, from this reviewer's point of view, is a discussion of the inextricability of sexuality and spirituality, and how this reality must fuel future conversations about Christian sexuality. We are all "fragile" in our sexuality, such that condemnations and judgements have no place, least of all within a Christian community, where healing and reconciliation ought to be emblemmatic. Such healing will often carry us to depths of intra- psychic transformation we dare not have thought possible. Alice Miller's "The Drama of the Gifted Child", a brilliant and recently revised treatment of this corollary topic, makes an excellent companion volume to Grenz's.
Customer Reviews:
Painfully Boring! .......2006-08-01
I must agree with the reviews of Perri Litton, Kevin Lee, and P. Wilson. This book is extremely boring. I'm halfway through the book. It's painful to try to finish. I paid money for this book. That is the only reason I haven't put the book back on the book shelf. This book is 232 pages. I can normally read such a short book in one day but I've been struggling for 8 days to finish.
I've read 3 of James Earl Hardy's previous novels; "B-Boy Blues", "2nd Time Around" and "If Only For One Nite". "A House Is Not A Home" is by far the worst.
I was hoping that it would get better as I go along. I lost hope when I read the reviews. If you MUST read this book, check it out from the library.
What was I thinking .......2006-01-16
I am glad that a friend brought the book and gave it to me a gift (which I regifted). For one I wish the author would learn to keep a consistent writing style or learn how to keep his in a range. I cannot compare this book to ealier writings. I can be truthful and say this B-Boys blues was the best and Love the one your with was good, Everything else was horrible. James Earl Hardy was very sloppy with the other three books not mention (for your own sake), I actually started reading this book in a book store and realized it was not good enough to buy. Thank goodness for amazon's discounts because you would be wasting some serious money on this.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.......2006-01-12
The "B" in B-Boy Blues must stand for BORING. I gave it 1 star because zero stars are not permitted.
A Jood Mess.......2005-10-26
I'm sorry, but did I read the same book as the other reviewers? I purchased this book just knowing it was going to be off da chain just based on the reviews from this site. Damn I was wrong. I own every book in the B-boy Blues series and I must say that this maybe the worst of them all. What about going out with a bang? I gave this book 2 stars just because he caught us up pretty well with everyone. I consider the rest a jood mess.
A Sweet and Simple Swan Song.......2005-09-01
James Earl Hardy ends his ground-breaking B-Boy Blues series with a sweet, simple, and constantly affirming tale of black same gender-loving life and love, with particular and powerful focus on the diverse black family.
The sometimes stormy romance, first introduced in 1992, involving buppie journalist Mitchell and Harlem homeboy Raheim, has come full circle when we encounter them in the 2003-set "A House Is Not A Home."
After more than a decade together, they have separated, but have not fully parted, though both re-explore past sexual connections.
Raheim, who has had some Hollywood success and continues to battle certain addictions, must consider the ramifications of coming out to the whole world when he is offered a plum lead in a film about an openly gay athlete.
Mitchell is pretty much a stay-at-home dad. He has a five year old daughter adopted as a new-born from blood relatives. He is also rearing his live-in godson, Erroll, Raheim's 15 year old son we have gotten to know as "Junior" in the 5 previous installments.
Though Mitchell's parenting skills are noteworthy and productive, and are fully supported on both sides of the sexual orientation spectrum, Mitchell, a gifted literary and journalistic artist, wants more out of life.
'House' explores Mitchell, 37, and Raheim, 30, facing life's crossroads, as well as confronting the truths about their mutual relationship.
Told in an easy, dialogue-rich manner (Hardy's ace), 'House' is marvelously deceptive in its unadorned but diamond-class celebration of 'real' family values and the 'it-takes-a-village-credo.
This gentle, unassuming, and heartwarming story, spanning a 4 day Spring weekend in the Big Apple, is filled with universal themes that at once transcend and embrace the sexual and humanitarian natures of our two appealing protagonist. Black or white, gay or straight, "A House Is Not a Home" is a lovely family portrait worthy of being in that honored place on the mantle, above the soothing fireplace.
The fell-good novel of the year.
Book Description
He's Just Not in the Stars is a sinful combination of He's Just Not That into You, Sex and the City, and The Secret Language of Birthdays. If all is fair in love and war, this is the right ammunition. . . .
Hindsight is 20/20. Love is blind. With all that good and bad vision out there, who's gonna give you some serious insight?
Sex columnist and love astrology expert Jenni Kosarin is taking names and kicking astrological butt. . . . Flirt. Crush. Boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend. Husband. Whatever. What's his potential? What's he looking for? How do you fix things once you've messed up? Which sign will give you another chance and which won't? Find out his idiosyncrasies before you date him. Find out who's ready for a relationship and who'll still be hanging out in twentysomething bars in fifteen years. (Uh. Creepy.)
Here, get the scoop on how your man stacks up. Decipher. Crack the code. Get stellar advice.
The concept is revolutionary: Combine his Sun Sign with his Venus. That's all. No "rising signs," no tricking his mother into telling you what time he was born. No cookie-cutter generalizations. This book is frighteningly specific. Filled with sixty easy-to-follow combos, it's illustrated with ironic, gossip-filled, shocking real-life examples of famous celebs such as:
- Colin Firth (Virgo, Venus in Libra): Virgo + Libra = sexy and subtle combo
- Orlando Bloom (Capricorn, Venus in Pisces): Capricorn is all for security, Pisces is a full-on romantic = good guy
- Chris Rock (Aquarius, Venus in Capricorn): Aquarius can be about partnership when Capricorn grounds it
- Ethan Hawke (Scorpio, Venus in Scorpio): Ladykiller double sign combo
- Antonio Banderas (Leo, Venus in Virgo): Hint: the Virgo makes him stay
. . . plus many, many others. By defining him in a way that's never been done before, He's Just Not in the Stars gives it to you straight. No tiptoeing around. No hugging and sharing. No coddling. Deal with it.
(Cue drum roll.) This is for the woman who wants to take charge of her own destiny. Is he in the stars? Time won't tell. Jenni Kosarin will.
He's Just Not in the Stars is the last hip, irreverent relationship book you'll ever want. Throw away the rest . . .
They're taking up space where your happily married pictures should go.
Customer Reviews:
It was so good I bought 3!.......2007-08-10
I hate self help books. I hate relationship books. I hate fluffy new ager books.
And so on a trip to a New Age-y Bookstore I randomly found this book and flipped to the section of the guy Im after. Dead on. I laughed out loud and was surprised to find this book was none of those things I hate; it was actually funny, blatantly honest, and accurate.
How do you know its accurate? Try yourself. I looked mine up and I was like 'If this said 'she' it would have me spot on!' And trust me its not something one would aspire to (being flakey, being paranoid, etc).
I picked the book up again and switched to the section on someone I'd had issues with for years. Boy if only Id had this book back then because it was SPOT ON!!! The best thing is that even though it tells you HOW your guy is; it tells you how to get him, drive him crazy, and win him back. Basically mess with his mind. Excellent.
I loved this book so much I bought myself a copy, my sister a copy, and my best friend a copy. I've never been so excited over a book! I hope to spread the word. Good stuff. I hope Miss Kosarin writes another book like everyone said Id love to hear what she has to say about the women!
My friends and I really enjoyed this book.......2007-05-19
Other than entertaining, it was extremely accurate! I loved it!
Oh, you are a dear, Kosarin.......2006-11-17
I think this is the second book I have by Kosarin. This one made me laugh my self silly on a rather awful day. Nothing like pining over a man for years, wondering what is wrong with myself and then finding out that he was a Kevin Federline anyway.
When I finally bought the book, I went through my entire collection of astrology charts to read about all the men in my life, past and present. This book really hit it on the head, in quite a refreshing, hilarious way. Extremely insightful.
Buy it if you love astrology. Buy it because of men. Buy it for yourself. Buy it because The title is so much more inviting than, "He's Just Not That Into You." Maybe he's just a jerk that you cannot astrologically put up with and be sane.
Funny, incredibly written, and dead-on true.......2006-11-15
Prior to reading this book I didn't know much about astrology, but it was one of the BEST BOOKS I'VE EVER READ. Like most guys, I went to the section that described me based on my sign, and I felt like I was reading my autobiography! Kosarin is a phenomenal writer and her pop culture references are hilarious, but ultimately, what makes this book so great is that it's ACCURATE. I can't see how anyone interested in love, astrology, dating, or human nature, could go without reading this book.
"Wickedly" Fun Astrological Advice.......2006-11-14
I bought this book on a whim and found it to be a lot of fun. Now I know why my ex-boyfriends didn't work out, among other reasons. I brought it to lunch with my girlfriends and they're hooked too.
Books:
- Hell Hath No Fury (Multiverse, Book 2)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- History: Fiction or Science? (Chronology, No. 1)
- Holidays on Ice: Stories
- Indiana Jones and the Emperor's Tomb (Prima's Official Strategy Guide)
- Into the Dreaming
Books Index
Books Home
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It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy
Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl-A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship
He's Just Not That Into You: Your Daily Wake-up Call
Be Honest--You're Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve
Stop Getting Dumped! All You Need to Know to Make Men Fall Madly in Love with You and Marry "The One" in 3 Years or Less
