Book Description
Millions of adults grew up with immature, self-absorbed parents who made their own children responsible for their physical and emotional well-being, expected admiration and constant attention, and reacted with criticism and blame when their slightest need went unmet. In this accessible book, psychologist Nina Brown helps grown children come to terms with the results of such an upbringing, including tendencies to overcomply to others' needs, withdraw when someone needs nurturing, and lack self-esteem. Through self-exploration exercises and protective and coping strategies, Brown helps readers work toward developing a "healthy narcissism" by identifying destructive patterns their parents may have had, evaluating attitudes and behaviors that may be hampering their own adult relationships, dealing with self-doubt and other negative feelings, and piecing together a more integrated sense of self.
Customer Reviews:
It all makes so much sense now! .......2007-09-05
The explanations and descriptions in this book demonstrate what happens between my mother and I. Now... so many things make SENSE! This book has changed my life.
Narcissists do not have children to give, but to receive. They do not see their children as individuals, but as extensions of themselves. Therefore, their boundary issues, the words they say and the things they do that has compromised your relationship with your parent for so long are now explained by Dr. Brown. She does ask that you get a second opinion to keep yourself in check - that you're not jumping to any conclusions. She also has exercises about yourself and your parent that help you to determine if you are a child of the self-absorbed. I would have to say that most of us KNOW it. Like if they've ever thrown a birthday party for you and invited all of her friends instead of yours. (sorry TMI)
Yes, as Dr. Brown states, it is true that that your narcissistic parent will not change. If your parent truly is a narcissist, you probably already know that trying to change them or even attempting to make them SEE & understand what you're trying to say often does more harm than good. Dr. Brown says from the beginning to not be tempted to share what you have learned about their personality disorder with them. This is because there are two sides to a narcissist - the grand, show-offy side, and then the other side, which consists of an impoverished self, with low self-esteem and a painful inability to ever see their flawed self, or to even be able to laugh at themselves.
The things that helped me the most was to learn that IT'S NOT ME - all those times I've talked / explained until I was blue in the face and she still didn't seem to understand what I was saying is finally explained to me. It has to do with the fact that narcissits do not have the ability to have empathy - to be able to stand in someone else's shoes and feel what they are feeling. Therefore, all those times you tried to explain, and they did not GET it now makes sense. It is not possible for them to have empathy, even if their words speak logically as if they do.
Also, to learn that they believe that everyone thinks the way that they do, and therefore, if they think something is wrong - then it IS wrong in their world. Oh what a relief to have this brought to light - what a relief to know that someone can explain it. It was also a great relief to learn about how they twist the truth around. They even lie. Yes, they know they are lying but they feel completely justified in the lie. This explains so much about the untruthfulness.
Another thing that was mindblowing for me was the part that dealt with this concept that narcissits project their negative emotions onto others, especially their children, in order to feel better. I have been absorbing her emotions from the time I was a child, and I feel that this is the core to my eating disorder. This explains why I have avoided my mother ever since my brother took his life last year. Although completely subconscious, I somehow knew before reading this book to protect myself from her; that she would project her intense negative emotions to me and I knew it would trigger my depression, and I can't afford that with my own grief and a family to take care of. But before this book, I was not able to explain to anyone why I could not be a comfort to my mother - only that she would trigger my depression. That much, I did know.
The best thing is - that 2/3 of this book (approximately) deals with helping those of us who have been raised by the self-absorbed. Things like learning to have things bounce off of us, deflective body language, and how to deflect their manipulation are examples. There are many options given, and although some of them seem impossible, don't discount them because there might be a situation that would call for this particular reaction. You will have to learn to field things.
Finally, one reads this book assuming that you do want to continue a relationship with this parent. Many people scoff at keeping a narcissist in your life. However, not every person is "all bad". Remember that. (Unless they truly are all bad, and too toxic to manage.)
And yes, there are some typos and gramatical errors, but this book is written with a great deal of intellect. There aren't too many, and they certainly don't get in the way of how the book reads or speaks to you. And about the bullets - another reviewer complained of them. Yes, there are many bulleted lists depicting characteristics, feelings, etc. Even if they are not appropriate, I feel that they help the reader to absorb and ponder each point given one-by-one instead of breezing through them too quickly.
If you were raised by self-absorbed parent(s), this book can help you, I have no doubt. As I said in the beginning - everything suddenly makes sense, from musty old memories to dealing with the parent today in adult life.
must have!.......2007-08-09
For anyone who has noticed their parent with self-absorbed issues, this is a must. This was the missing piece for understanding myself and my mother. It has helped me from passing on the same traits down to my child. It has been eye-opening to say the least.
Informative.......2007-06-27
Good to detect and recognize pattern from your parent(s) and thus explaining why you might react and act in a certain way when you grow older.
Many excersises to do that I opted out. Now at least I understand that I was right and my parent was wrong. It wasnt me that was wrng and that is the most important lesson for me to learn from ths book.
Author advised that you endure the punishment.......2007-05-18
This book advocates that the adult child put up with the abuse because the adult will never recognize their own narcissistic and abusive behavior. Since they are unable to change, the best we can do is adapt and change to accomodate their abuse. Poo on that! I got this book five years ago and following these guidelines simply enabled another lost 5 years of my life. No one should have to put up with such abuse. Ever. There must be a better solution - LEAVE!
Terrific-great insight!.......2007-05-14
I found this very helpful. It is written well, with advice on how to handle difficult people and situations.
Book Description
For 20 million Americans the long process of healing after the devastation of divorce began with a single step. Most found their way alone, making mistakes and trying to reinvent their lives through trial and error. Now, borrowing the wisdom gained in the development of 12 Step Programs, Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting On offers learned and proven support. Author Micki McWade adapts the best techniques, information and life lessons of long established recovery programs to provide a concise and comprehensive pathway to fulfilling life after divorce. Whether during the painful days of the divorce itself or in the adaptive weeks and months that follow, McWade offers valuable ideas that work in relationships with children and with (ex) spouses. Readers are also provided with step-by-step encouragement and guidance for forming their own divorce support groups.
Customer Reviews:
The Recovery Model Can Help Divorced Adults.......2007-05-21
Typical recovery programs focus on issues like alcohol or drug addiction, or perhaps sexual addiction. The twelve-step model is well-known, and despite some critics --- it works very well for many, many people -- every day.
The author shares her own experience and then blends in the concepts and ideas of twelve-step recovery programs. Sprinkled throughout the pages are thoughts, ideas, prayers, inspirations, words of encouragement. The result is a very effective read for anyone who is experiencing a divorce and its aftermath.
We were not familiar with this author before picking up this book; however on reading it carefully we can recommend it. The book is well done; the information is extremely encouraging, and the 'recovery model' applies well to the stages of moving forward after divorce.
Dr. David & Lisa Frisbie
The Center for Marriage & Family Studies
Authors of 8 books, including Moving Forward After Divorce: Practical Steps to * Healing Your Hurts * Finding Fresh Perspective * Managing Your New Life
Blah blah blah.......2007-01-20
Too much psycho-babble and not enough real life advise. It was a chore to get through it when what I really needed was a swift kick in the pants! Turns out that dumping my zero of a husband was the best thing I ever did - and I just went with my gut. I guess I was looking for justification - turned out later he was a drug addict! Duh! Sometimes we just need to listen to God's voice directing us and that's good enough!
A Wonderful Daily Read! .......2006-07-18
This pair of books by Micki are used continuously by myself, and others from the Divorce prayer group at our Church. A wonderful read for group discussion, and daily meditations.
Living Life after the Facade of Fantasy Fades.......2004-09-01
My hope for you is that you will find strength and comfort within these steps. They offer practical suggestions for getting through the tumult and minimizing long-term damage to you and your family. ~Micki McWade
Micki McWade was thrown into an extremely precarious and vulnerable position when she and her husband separated in the fall of 1990. Through overwhelming grief, she struggled through a breakup that was more trying than she had ever anticipated.
At that time she was a member of Al-Anon (a support group for families of alcoholics) and was practicing the Twelve Steps. This helped her to clarify what she was going through, reduced her inner turmoil and helped to create some semblance of peace. After experiencing divorce first-hand, she decided to create a support group for separated and divorced individuals who needed advice, friendship and hope.
In the first chapter, Micki presents a basic understanding of the divorce situation. For women, this can often mean a loss of income, immense grief and the loss of major support systems present when you marry into another family. She explains how she felt, how others feel and what you might be experiencing. This chapter also briefly delves into the are of spirituality (a higher power) and then concludes with the serenity prayer.
Chapter two explains the Twelve Step Recovery Program and lists the steps. Chapter Three takes each step and explains it in depth.
Throughout this book, you will find prayers, inspirational quotes, a deep understanding of the issues at hand and an immense helping of encouragement. Women are especially vulnerable in divorce situations and Micki's story is all too typical of what happens to many women when they have stayed home to take care of their children and been a support to their husbands. If she could survive her divorce, I think anyone could as long as they were patient with themselves. So, this book can give women hope.
In the second section there are tools for recovery that include information on how to create a support group. Chapter five gives four main slogans and explanations for how these can be used in the support group setting for discussion. Chapter seven is filled with personal stories of women who experienced divorce and Susan had an interesting idea about "the person who emotionally leaves the relationship is the initiator."
If you are looking for support during a very difficult time in your life, this book can help you free yourself from your past and encourage spiritual growth. I can also recommend "Daily Meditations: For Surviving a Breakup, Separation or Divorce."
~TheRebeccaReview.com
A Great Help!.......2003-10-29
A helpful book to read and guide you thru a divorce. You can Get Up, Get Over and Get On with your life.
Book Description
Yes, you can change your life . . . now!
If you're depressed, lonely, guilty, anxious, or otherwise emotionally ill, you don't have to be. The first step is to realize that you do have power over the way you feel. The second step is to master the simple, no-nonsense, five-minute strategies in this uniquely helpful and ground-breaking book.
Rapid Cognitive Therapy has been tested and proven effective. It is based on the ACT Formula: Accept your current reality. Choose to create what you want in your life. Take action to create it.
This important guide will show you how to:
* Let go of the self-defeating thoughs that are holding you back
* Gain control over your relationships
* Develop self-confidence and self-esteem
* Get rid of your old, unproductive "change" strategies and replace them with "choose" strategies
Featuring 38 tests and exercises to help you pinpoint your problems and find immediate relief.
Customer Reviews:
VERY HELPFUL book!.......2005-03-10
I read this book more than 15 years ago and I still use the strategies today. In fact, now that my own teen is dealing with depression issues, I've taught him to use the strategies as well. I read the book after about 2 years of psychotherapy. While the therapy was VERY helpful, this book gave me very concrete skills and within a month, I no longer felt the need to continue therapy. If you faithfully complete the exercises, you can learn great techniques that make a difference.
at least a few good points, too much to evaluate easily.......2001-11-08
Here's what I like:
pages 20-21 list of factors in dealing with
feelings
pages 25-26 list of mental blockage indicators
pages 30-31 kinds of resistance to change
pages 40-48 emotional strategies ==> how
to improve emotional intelligence!!!
pages 136-138 list of inappropriate communication
techniques.
The general strategies developed in pages 1-96 are
applied later to anxiety, anger, loneliness, depression.
An appendix expands this list to confusion, disappointment,
envy, facial tics, frustration, guilt, and helplessness.
most helpful book i ever read..........2000-03-19
i have a copy of this book i have referred to many times since the 80's. i do not know the authors, nor do i have any vested interest in a submitting a complimentary review. i have never submitted such a review before. i attest that this book is the single most helpful self-help book that i have ever had the good fortune to read. in one's darkest hour, it can help you INSTANTLY...i am happy it is still available, and i am buying a copy for a friend in need (not wanting to part with my own!)
Excellent source of coping stratgies.......1998-03-06
Among the hundreds of serious and not-so pop psych books I've read, "Rapid Relief" actually works. Particularly useful is the "emotional scale" which can help you understand what you or others are going through as you go through your ups and downs.
However "Rapid" is NOT a substitute for deep work with an qualified, experienced and insightful therapist. Instead it's an execellent source of day to day coping stratgies. For eight bucks, that's quite a deal.
Book Description
Introduction MY MOTHER WAS FORTY the day the photographer came to our house on Cherry Court and lined us kids up behind my parents, who were sitting shoulder to shoulder on the piano bench. I've never forgotten how she looked. She was in her mint-green knit suit. Her brooch and earrings were the same gold tone as the buttons on her closed jacket. Her soft strawberry-blond hair was in tamed curls framing her bespectacled, confident face. I was a teenager looking through a different lens that day, but what I captured was just as permanent an image as the portrait that hung for years on our dining room wall. While the photographer was setting up his tripod, I was looking into the future. In that moment, watching my mom settle onto the piano bench, I saw how profound it was to be a woman at forty. Forty meant freedom. When you were forty, you could be yourself, you didn't have to live up to other's expectations. Forty meant you could wear whatever you wanted to, because by then you were your full, radiant self, not a copy of someone else. I could hardly wait to be just like my mom, an original, in her mint-green suit on that fall day in North Dakota. Now, twenty-some years later, it could be me sitting on that piano bench with my teenaged daughters and my son posing behind me. I've grown up. Not only am I in my forties myself, but it's also my good fortune to be working every day with women in their forties, dressing them to look their beautiful selves. I wonder if it really was easier back then, or did my mom just make it look easy? Life seems so complicated today. Women have been crazy busy. Look around. We've climbed the corporate ladder, survived a divorce or two or three, been to therapy. If you're forty, you may have earned a black belt in juggling careers and family. I know you. While you're making time to mentor a coworker, you're also closely following the basketball or soccer seasons of your kids, consoling one friend through a breakup, or helping another one plan her wedding. Chances are you're the most likely one to be neglected. While you're chasing life down the fast lane, you're not sure how to dress yourself anymore. Your wardrobe's been slogging along in the slow lane for a decade or maybe two. Where does a real woman go for relevant advice on style and clothes? Fashion magazines? They're filled with pages of twenty-year-olds weighing less than a hundred pounds. Do you take the advice of your teenaged daughter—in orange hair and skimpy T-shirt, with a pierced tongue and belly-button ring? No. When you manage to grab a minute to shop for yourself, what do you find on the racks? Retro fashions in Day-Glo colors, showing up again like a bad dream. Aaaugh! This is hard work! Everything's stopped making sense. To confuse the issue even more, you're living in a different body. Your shape is changing, and your hair and attitudes are too. Where do you fit in? I've heard the lamenting. If you could make it all go away, you would. You may be older and wiser, but opening your closet door still brings you to your knees. You could have written the Roy Lichtenstein caption on the T-shirt that says, “I feel like such a failure! I've been shopping for over twenty years, and I still don't have anything to wear!” Should you just give up? Hold everything! Amidst the world's clatter, it's time to do the unthinkable—to slow down, turn the focus on yourself, and do a major check-in. Who are you right now? Get current. Take a good long look, discover yourself anew. It's the right time to take a look in the mirror and make peace with this body, these arms, these thighs, these gorgeous lips, and this hair flecked with gray. This precious body of yours has made it through one million comparisons and has defied the look of the Kate Moss print ads on the sides of city buses. It's time to invite a new love affair into your life—a love affair with your every line, every tooth, every toenail, every facial expression, every whim and desire. Passionate, wild, crazy, frivolous, impulsive—make it a love affair with yourself. You've earned it. There are no more excuses. There's no time to waste, nothing's more important. You have collected half a lifetime of laughs, wisdom, accomplishments, mistakes, integrity, and experience. You've kept getting better and better. Now it's time to express that on the outside—confidently, boldly. There is freedom at forty, the freedom I saw in my mother's eyes, in her sure smile. With a little excavating and renovating of attitudes, you'll be wearing that freedom too. It's under the surface, waiting to reveal itself. You'll find it in these forty chapters of fashion advice. You'll learn how to combine looks, passion, personality, and preferences into the perfect recipe for wearing clothes and accessories—while having delicious fun. Forget about problem areas! Go somewhere else to hear about camouflage tricks. You'll be too busy falling in love with yourself when you put the focus on what works (a great smile, pretty skin, shapely calves). Other body parts will quiet down and assume their proper proportion. You'll find the correlation between your personality and preferences and discover how to wear them proudly. You'll learn how to shop for a bathing suit with dignity and courage, what to wear while going through a divorce, what to do instead of (or until) plastic surgery, and how to walk away from clothing with “potential” and only buy what works. I won't ask you to do anything I haven't already done in my forties. I've been the mom who frantically shopped for school lunch ingredients at 7 A.M. in my accessorized jammies. Following my own advice on dressing for a high school reunion, I snagged a sweetheart at mine. I've given in to friends who insisted I'd lost ten pounds when all I'd really done was lift up my bra straps and loosen my belt. It's all doable. My clients in my style and wardrobe consulting business prove it to me every single day. I invite you to zero in on the ordinary thing that you do everyday—
getting dressed— and turn it into an opportunity
for personal expression, peace, and joy
beyond words. After you've done your homework, it'll be so much easier to turn off the screaming consumer ads, ignore questionable advice from teenaged daughters or well-meaning friends, and trust yourself. You can and will love how you look in clothes. Come on, I'm going to show you how.
Customer Reviews:
Wasn't looking for a self-help guide........2007-09-09
The author implies that all women over 40 are overweight, frumpy, and in need of an injection of self-esteem. Thankfully, this is not the case, and the rest of us are perhaps looking for style guidance (how to look sexy and chic without dressing like a 20-year-old), not a personal cheerleading section. Then there are her practical tips: Wear clothes that match your hair color? Throw a nice trench over your rumpled house clothes if you have to step out? Don't feel guilty about pampering yourself? For any woman even remotely self-aware and style conscious, this guide will be useless -- unless she can find the humor in it.
if you have lived for others until now.......2007-06-08
a perfect book if you never walked in high heels or never considered your hairdresser a basic need.
if you feel that your time has passed, this is the book for you.
I will read again it when I will be around 57. now I am forty and I feel like it has been written for another woman.
We're Not All Frumps at Forty.......2007-05-13
I am sorry, I did not like this book. It just wasn't for me. I do not have any of the problems it addresses. However I think it would be helpful for women who do. It made it sound like we all turn into frumps at forty.
Save's a lot of money........2007-05-07
Reminds you what you all ready know and don't admitt. Save a lot of money with its tips. Wear what's really good for you.
Helpful, wise and funny.......2007-04-11
This is a useful book for women over 40 seeking to revamp and update their wardrobe and enjoy doing it! It helps fill the gap for fashion advice for the older woman who is not ready for housecoats and leisure suits. I bought this book with several others - Sam Saboura's Real Style and Kendall Farr's The Pocket Stylist - none is complete in itself, so if you are after one book to cover everything this is not it. Also note that 40 over 40 contains no photographs, only cute graphics, which adorn but do not illustrate the text. This may be less helpful to some, but it does prevent the book from dating too quickly (it was printed in 1999). I loved Brenda Kinsel's humorous style, and her tackling of the emotional issues eg inexplicable attachments we have to our aging garments, and the mad frenzy at sale time that fills our wardrobes with even more stuff we don't wear! She also provides useful exercises in discovering one's personal style, and celebrating one's body regardless of age or size. Would make a wonderful gift for any woman in this age bracket who is even remotely interested in clothes and looking stylish.
Average customer rating:
- Blah blah blah and {yawn}
- Emotional Survival Skills for Everyone
- Positive Meditations!
- Get started on emotional healing
- Real help for moving on
|
Daily Meditations for Surviving a Breakup, Separation or Divorce (Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting on Series)
Micki McWade
Manufacturer: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
 Meditation
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General
| Psychology & Counseling
| Health, Mind & Body
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General
| Mental Health
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Family Health
| Parenting & Families
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Divorce
| Family Relationships
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ASIN: 1891400320
Release Date: 2004-07-01 |
Book Description
When we suffer the loss of a relationship, we may feel as if our whole world is crumbling. We may believe we will never feel whole again. It's difficult to adjust to life alone, and to find the strength to go on, recover and rebuild. The good news is that it is possible.
The separation from a loved one or a divorce, while difficult, also presents opportunities for personal growth. We have the option of stagnation by choosing to live in the past or the potential for bursting out of our former limitations and moving on to bigger and better things. This book will help you gently pick up the pieces of the past, save what was good and create a better life.
Customer Reviews:
Blah blah blah and {yawn}.......2007-01-20
Whatever - very fluffy - very psycho-babblish. Was expecting Christ-centered stuff and it wasn't even close. Wasn't looking to be pet - wanted to be stronger as I had 4 kids still to take care of.
Emotional Survival Skills for Everyone.......2004-09-01
We have the option of stagnation by choosing to live in the past or the potential for bursting out of our former limitations and moving on to bigger and better things. ~Micki McWade
While this book focuses on the survival of separation, divorce or even a breakup, it can also be read to gain insight into emotional survival itself. Micki McWade is a clinical social work who consults with divorce recovery groups in New York State. She is also the author of Getting Up, Getting Over, Getting On: A Twelve Step Guide to Divorce Recovery. She also went through a divorce in 1993 after 23 years of marriage and a three-year separation.
When the world crumbles, it is comforting to find an author who understands your conflicted emotions, the suffering you are enduring and can also help you see that even in the worst situation, there is room for personal growth.
The goal of this book is to hasten recovery and one of the first items in this book is the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. It is then followed by the Twelve Steps of Divorce Recovery.
I would have liked this to be set up more as Day 1 on your road to recovery, Day 2, etc. However, perhaps this is a magical book where what you need most will be on the day of the year you need it. So, start this book on the date you are reading it and perhaps that message will be specifically for your healing at that particular moment. You may also want to read the entire book and make notes, although many of these lessons are probably best read and absorbed over time.
Life is complex enough without having to deal with all the tragedies of existence itself. Micki McWade is a friend who carefully guides you through the initial emotional storms and then helps you awaken from the deep waters of despair. She leads you to water where you can stand and technically, helps you "wade" through the internal conflicts that seem inevitable.
Each daily reading contains a quote and wise comments about how to live a more fulfilling life. I especially liked the quote by Katherine Paterson: What a gift of grace to be able to take the chaos from within and from it create some semblance of order.
On of the main themes of this book is to look to the future and imagine your future happiness as opposed to dwelling on the past sorrows. I also learned an important principle from March 21, where she talks about living in a state of fear or a state of love. It is interesting to note that when a person attacks you, a loving response is almost sure to dissuade further attacks. When we see how many people need our love, we can then respond in a more loving fashion instead of recoiling into a state of fear and preparing our own attack. Easier said than done.
Each meditation ends with an affirmation.
Affirmation: Today I will remember that my experience on earth includes the intellectual, physical, emotional and spiritual levels , and I will try to incorporate all levels into my daily existence.
~TheRebeccaReview.com
Positive Meditations!.......2003-10-29
A wonderful book with positive meditations that helped me get thru a hard time. I have read this book twice and will pick it up again when I need to.
Get started on emotional healing.......2003-03-23
"Daily Meditations" is a series of 365 daily meditations all of which are related to encouragement and healing for those dealing with loss in their life. Each day starts with an appropriate quote, followed by a short meditation and ending with an affirmation for the day. These are strong positive meditations that are sure to make a difference in the reader's life if they will take the time to reflect on them. This is a life-changing book and a highly recommended read.
Real help for moving on.......2002-07-07
Up till now surviving a breakup meant obsessing on the person until time faded the pain. These daily readings, from a wide variety of sources, help steer people toward actively looking at their own thoughts and behaviors. By giving this reader plenty to gnaw on, it began to move her away from the "poor, victimized me" syndrome.
When I got divorced I needed something on my bedside table I could open up and read at any time, especially in the middle of the night when the biggest demons come out to play. I find this book soothing yet firm, and always positive. It always leads me forward, not back. It helps me see that life can really be different and better, and that I can create my own circumstances. What a powerful notion, and I have started to put it to work.
This is not a book I plan to put away when I finish it. Even now, when I reread certain passages, I come away with new interpretations and ideas, and I can see my own progress.
Customer Reviews:
The "TRUE" Benedict Arnold of the Automotive sales industry.......1997-03-10
If you really want the "inside scoop" on how car dealers and car salesmen "really" make their money, then this is one book you can not do without
Customer Reviews:
Not so funny.......2007-09-10
While the fear of flying may be an unrational fear, it is a VALID fear. The authors comedic stories about freak airplane accidents made me feel more nervous about flying! If it can happen to them.... it can happen to me!! I have had success in the past with a fear of flying book, but it was so long ago I don't recall the title. Since the birth of my daughter I found the fear coming back. Unfortunatly this was not the book to help me feel secure 30,000 feet up.
As a therapist for people with phobias- this is a must! .......2006-08-16
I am told, time and again how helpful this book is for my patients and I literally ask every patient I work with, that is struggling with a flying phobia, to get this book immediately! Excellent resource!
The very BEST book about the fear of flying!.......2006-03-23
I have been a fearful flyer for 15+ years. I have read numerous books about this subject. Ms. Ridley's approach at addressing this irrational fear is one of a kind. Her comical approach mixed with the facts made for a clear understanding as to how safe flying really is. In fact after reading this book and boarding that plane it was the first time in my life where I actually was able to stop my obsessive negative thoughts and think about the facts. I have been avoiding planes for years and when I had to fly for my job, I purchased this book. As I was reading this I found myself laughing out loud over and over again. This book is an absolute scream! This woman is hilarious! Ms. Ridley knows what it means to be TERRIFIED to fly! All of her obsessive thoughts were identical to mine. She doesn't surgarcoat the facts but she helps you to look at the facts and realize that flying really isn't as dangerous as you think it is! The data is a bit outdated and the terrorist infomration isn't current because it was written prior to the Sept. 11th attacks. However, there are enough facts which I feel were very useful. I highly recommend this book!
This book actually helped me!.......2005-08-14
This book is funny and educational at the same time. I laugh out loud when I read it because Ms. Ridley knows the mind of someone who fears flying very well. She reasons with us with her humor and what she teaches is quite logical. I have a library of self-help books and I think that this is one of the few that I've read from beginning to end AND one that has helped me. I recommend it to others in the same predicament all the time. The book actually helped me to understand how a plane flies, what all the strange noises are and I feel less stressed when I read it because I laugh so much! I've read the book while flying and before flying. Although the book was published a number of years ago all the advice is applicable to us today. If you can't find a new edition look for it on the internet under out-of-print books and you should be able to get a copy.
Funny and helpful.......2000-02-19
This book is extremely funny (esp. her section of what she thinks is wrong with the plane when she flies vs. what is actually happening). It's easy to really relate to the author because of her friendly, funny, human voice, so when she researches flying and explains why it's NOT something to fear, you really believe her.
Actually a fun read even if you don't mind flying...
Average customer rating:
- ESPO dont lie
- THIS BOOK IS AMAZING
- Three Words
- Scratching on the wall
- Same old same old...
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The Art of Getting Over
Stephen Powers
Manufacturer: St. Martin's Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
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ASIN: 0312206305 |
Book Description
What started as simple street movement, a way to assert individuality and pride, has blossomed into much more: Graffiti is everywhere. From Sprite commercials to The Source magazine to Soho art galleries, the elements and vernacular of the graffiti aesthetic are apparent in today's society. This book examines graffiti's influence from its earliest days to its undeniable ubiquity now. Written by an insider, it includes a general history, in-depth interviews with both the progenitors of the form and current artists, and full-color illustrations of the most important works over the last 30 years. Unlike other subcultures that have been corrupted by the media and the mainstream, graffiti has maintained its sense of the underground and its clandestine feel. The purity and integrity that have defined the graffiti writer's mission have never faltered. The Art of Getting Over offers an unprecedented glimpse into this deeply affecting urban art form.
Customer Reviews:
ESPO dont lie.......2007-03-26
This book is on point! reading this took me back to that day and age of no worrys,no cares the only problem you had was where am i rackin' my next can of paint! Great book, and everything in it is 100% acurate!
THIS BOOK IS AMAZING.......2004-09-15
Wow is one way to put it. I just loved this book. It has the the writers I have always admired like kad. Pictures are great. And its philadelhia!!!!!
Three Words.......2004-01-25
RAZZ, KADISM and SUROC! You can read about New York writers in any book. Reading about these Philadelphia standouts is worth the price alone.
Scratching on the wall.......2002-05-21
This book rides totally on the surface of the misunderstood subculture of graffit writers. It fails to address the larger social issues of alienation and angst that most serious graffiti writers feel. Lots of snapshot style pictures that aren't that great considering the subject matter. It's basically a book by a graffiti writer for other graffiti writers. It's strange that for all the attention graffiti writers seem to so desperately to need, their intentions after all is said and done are very shallow.
They have no great cause or social statement to make. If you want to see graffiti that's real, you won't find it in this book
Same old same old..........2002-05-20
This book is the same old one-sided ranting found in most graffiti books. It only tells one side of the story; the selfishness of most graffiti writers to place their egos on city walls. It says nothing about how graffiti effects the people who live with it everyday in their neighborhoods. It also says nothing about how graffiti has fueled a multi-billion dollar abatement industry in the US alone. No voices are heard from the real thing that keeps graffiti alive; the intense effort by US city governments to eradicate it. This book only scratches the surface. If you want a book that gets much deep check out Michael Walsh's powerful book Graffito. It hits on everything I've mentioned here and is visually much more dynamic.
Book Description
A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM - 10 Steps to Heal Your Heart After an Unhappy Ending (SAME Ink) is a "reality check you can cash." Los Angeles-based writer Sandra Ann Miller mixes wit with wisdom gained from her own unhappy endings to help the newly single put the pain into amusing perspective. A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM sparks the revolution on how women handle the end of a relationship. The Guide's 10 Steps provide the survival skills required to make it through a breakup with dignity and pride intact. Laugh-out-loud humor is tempered with compassion as the reader is reminded that she determines her fate...not the man who broke her heart. A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM is short, sweet and to the sharp point of how to manage the hurt - as well as the burgeoning insanity - and start the healing. "A wonderful and helpful guide that every woman should have on her bookshelf. The ten steps are right on the mark. A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM is a funny and empowering antidote for a broken heart." Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider Co-authors of THE RULES "I wish I could have read this book years ago. Whether you're looking for the next Mr. Right or not, every woman can learn from A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM. It's just brilliant." Cheryl Tiegs Supermodel/Icon
Customer Reviews:
The Sensible, Witty "Best Friend" Everyone Should Have.......2007-08-01
There's nothing like a good dose of truth and logic, wrapped up nicely with witty and appropriate analogies, to get you moving on with your life after a break up. Ms. Miller provides an easy-to-read-and-understand guide for accepting reality and not wasting time "what-iffing" a situation that wasn't meant to be. Her sense of humor is warm and her advice is so sensible it's impossible to ignore!
What to give somone you love who is hurting.......2007-07-28
This little book has tons of great advice to help someone who is having a difficult time get over a relationship. I only wish I had known about it sooner.
A Girlfriend's Guide To Getting Over Him.......2007-06-28
This book is way over priced. There are to many blank pages, half full pages, and large print to make the book look like it is larger than it is. The subject is good and written well but not worth $14.95.
More Than Just Break-Up Advice!.......2007-01-16
I happened to read this book after I had been in a "bad relationship" with a terrible job, and was in the process of starting over and trying to find a better position - something that I would be with for a long, satisfying time. I found all of the steps (slightly modified to fit the content, obviously), to help me heal from my past job experiences and to have the self-confidence and chutspa to go out and land the job of my dreams. This book isn't just about learning to heal from a bad relationship, it is about remembering how none of us deserve to be mistreated in the first place. Thanks, Ms. Miller - your book changed my life!
Brillant, funny, insightful and fabulous!.......2006-11-17
4 things we need to remember about ourselves when going through those icky times! Sandra captures it all in a fun way. She makes a very difficult time much easier to manage. That jagged little pill now has smooth, round edges. I wish I had this when I went through my worst one! Even if you are one of the rare ones who have never experienced a bad break up, you'll enjoy this little gem.
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- Dry Bones Rattling: Community Building to Revitalize American Democracy (Princeton Studies in American Politics)
- Eternal Treblinka: Our Treatment of Animals and the Holocaust
- Every Heart Restored: A Wife's Guide to Healing in the Wake of a Husband's Sexual Sin (The Every Man Series)
- Faking It: How to Seem Like a Better Person Without Actually Improving Yourself
- Forever in Blue: The Fourth Summer of the Sisterhood (Sisterhood of Traveling Pants, Book 4)
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