The Platinum Rule: Discover the Four Basic Business Personalities andHow They Can Lead You to Success

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The Platinum Rule: Treat others as THEY want to be treated...

"It's about you, not me"

The Platinum Rule: 4 Basic Personalities

The Best of the Personality Styles Books

Understanding Yourself Increases Your Sales

The Platinum Rule: Discover the Four Basic Business Personalities andHow They Can Lead You to Success
Tony Alessandra , and Michael J. O'Connor
Manufacturer: Grand Central Publishing
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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People Smarts - Bending the Golden Rule to Give Others What They Want

The Platinum Rule for Sales Mastery: How to Adapt Your Selling Style to Match Every Prospect's Buying Style

Charisma: Seven Keys to Developing the Magnetism that Leads to Success

How to Be a Star at Work: 9 Breakthrough Strategies You Need to Succeed

Communicating at Work

ASIN: 0446673439

Customer Reviews:

The Platinum Rule: Treat others as THEY want to be treated..........2006-12-28

Great book. I use the concept all the time in my presentations and in my team's work. We have systems in place to approach the four different personality types and this book started that entire thought-process. Fantastic book! The current generation, the Generosity Generation, doesn't just want customer service, the members of this generation want a personalized EXPERIENCE. Read this book to open your eyes to how to provide that experience.

"It's about you, not me".......2006-04-27

The premise is simple: "Do unto others as they'd like done unto them."

The classic "Golden Rule" involves a perspective bias, the implicit selfishness of which can and will wreck your interactions with others. Even if you think you have the very best intentions, you'll unwittingly sabotage your objectives. By learning and applying the "Platinum Rule," you'll greatly improve the quality and effectiveness of your interactions with others.

So, how do you know what others would like do unto them? Ask them! Seriously, that's of course a necessary part, but the authors give very thorough treatment of the subject so the reader will know how to step into the worlds of others. They describe and discuss the four basic personality types and impart valuable knowledge about numerous blends of multiple types:

* Directors
* Relaters
* Socializers
* Thinkers

The book features twelve chapters:

1. Has the Golden Rule Lost its Glitter?
2. Getting to Know the Four Basic Styles
3. How to Tell Where You Fit In
4. The Key to Getting a Quick Handle on Anybody
5. How the Read the Mixed Styles
6. Coping Productively with the Other Styles
7. How to Adapt to Anyone...and Retain Your Own Identity
8. Using Individual Differences to Bring Out the Best in Groups
9. Creating a High-Performance Leadership Style
10. How to Sell by Style
11. Providing Service with Style
12. Changing the Rest of Your Life by Creating Positive Relationships

Each is excellent. Two quick examples of things that particularly resonated with me:

* Great discussion and example of the meaning and importance of adaptability (Ch. 7, pp. 131-133)
* Striking example and analysis of a sales environment and the ramifications of not fitting your sales style to the customer

This book is easy to read, practical, and powerful. I think everybody would benefit from reading and therefore highly recommend it to anyone.

The Platinum Rule: 4 Basic Personalities.......2006-02-25

Provides a fundamental understanding of the diverse personalities that we deal with on a day-to-day basis and how each individual has at least 2 of the 4 which cross depending on the circumstances or situations. Creates a less stressful and less frustrating frame of mind when dealing with conflict or differences.

The Best of the Personality Styles Books.......2005-02-27

The Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," is an excellent rule for ethical treatment of others. The Platinum Rule: "Do unto others as they prefer to be done unto," is an excellent rule for communicating with people in all kinds of environments.

Tony Alessandra and Michael O'Connor have written an excellent book similar to lots of other books that are out there. All the books and systems are based on the same Jungian Psychology of Personality Types.

You'll hear these different systems under a variety of names. You'll hear them as personality types or social styles or other things.

The most complex and best document of all of these is the Myers Briggs Type Inventory. It uses four dimensions to create sixteen basic personality types. Most of the social style systems are a bit simpler. They use two dimensions to create four personality types.

In my supervisory training and in using this material myself, I found that the MBTI is much more effective and nuanced in terms of analysis. But, I found that the social style systems are more likely to be used, and used effectively, when communicating in a social or business setting.

Essentially, you learn two things from any of these systems. You learn, first of all, how you tend to communicate, and what you value. Do you communicate directly or indirectly? Are you focused on the mission to be accomplished or on the relationship with the person you're communicating with?

The basic social style structure then shows you how to figure out what styles other people may use and a few other important things. You can learn how what you do can be very ineffective with some other people. And, you can use some things you can do differently to make your communication more effective.

There is a third advantage to this material if you are applying it in a work group where everybody uses the same material. That advantage is that this material will give you a common language for describing many types of communications in supervisory situations.

All of that is true for all the material that's out there on social styles. I think this is the best book, though.

What Alessandra and O'Connor have done that is different from others is they have given you the ability to use a very simple and rough-cut method and then also the ability to go deeper into more variance of style. It's almost like getting the best of the more complex instruments in with the simpler ones.

I've been using varieties of this material for almost thirty years in supervisory skills training. I've found that just about all of the reputable systems are first rate. But, you should buy this book if you want one solid insight and reference source to help you do more effective communicating.

Understanding Yourself Increases Your Sales.......2002-04-03

This book gives the student of human persuasion something to think about. Although not discovered by the authors, they outline four distinct personality styles. Knowing the style of your customer is a great advantage. They give numerous examples and insights on how to talk to and interact with the various styles. These examples and insights are very useful for a salesperson.

If you want to understand others first understand you. This work assists you in understanding what style personality you are. After understanding where you are coming from, you begin to understand where other people are coming from. This makes you an excellent communicator.

One of the most difficult areas of personal selling is figuring out what the customer really wants. This endeavor needs good communication skills on the part of the sales representative. Opening a window of communication with the customer is critical. And, you don't want the window to close when you have your neck out the window talking with the customer. Understanding how certain customers think about the world and other humans, helps with this window of communication. The authors give specific examples of how to talk to each personality style and what types of behaviors to expect.

Book Description

An ivy league murder, a mysterious coded manuscript, and the secrets of a Renaissance prince collide memorably in The Rule of Four—a brilliant work of fiction that weaves together suspense and scholarship, high art and unimaginable treachery.

It's Easter at Princeton. Seniors are scrambling to finish their theses. And two students, Tom Sullivan and Paul Harris, are a hair's breadth from solving the mysteries of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili—a renowned text attributed to an Italian nobleman, a work that has baffled scholars since its publication in 1499. For Tom, their research has been a link to his family's past—and an obstacle to the woman he loves. For Paul, it has become an obsession, the very reason for living. But as their deadline looms, research has stalled—until a long-lost diary surfaces with a vital clue. And when a fellow researcher is murdered just hours later, Tom and Paul realize that they are not the first to glimpse the Hypnerotomachia 's secrets.

Suddenly the stakes are raised, and as the two friends sift through the codes and riddles at the heart of the text, they are beginnning to see the manuscript in a new light—not simply as a story of faith, eroticism and pedantry, but as a bizarre, coded mathematical maze. And as they come closer and closer to deciphering the final puzzle of a book that has shattered careers, friendships and families, they know that their own lives are in mortal danger. Because at least one person has been killed for knowing too much. And they know even more.

From the streets of fifteenth-century Rome to the rarified realm of the Ivy League, from a shocking 500 year-old murder scene to the drama of a young man's coming of age, The Rule of Four takes us on an entertaining, illuminating tour of history—as it builds to a pinnacle of nearly unbearable suspense.

From the Hardcover edition.

Download Description

An ivy league murder, a mysterious coded manuscript, and the secrets of a Renaissance prince collide memorably in THE RULE OF FOUR -- a brilliant work of fiction that weaves together suspense and scholarship, high art and unimaginable treachery. It's Easter at Princeton. Seniors are scrambling to finish their theses. And two students, Tom Sullivan and Paul Harris, are a hair's breadth from solving the mysteries of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili--a renowned text attributed to an Italian nobleman, a work that has baffled scholars since its publication in 1499. For Tom, their research has been a link to his family's past -- and an obstacle to the woman he loves. For Paul, it has become an obsession, the very reason for living. But as their deadline looms, research has stalled -- until a long-lost diary surfaces with a vital clue. And when a fellow researcher is murdered just hours later, Tom and Paul realize that they are not the first to glimpse the Hypnerotomachia 's secrets. Suddenly the stakes are raised, and as the two friends sift through the codes and riddles at the heart of the text, they are beginnning to see the manuscript in a new light--not simply as a story of faith, eroticism and pedantry, but as a bizarre, coded mathematical maze. And as they come closer and closer to deciphering the final puzzle of a book that has shattered careers, friendships and families, they know that their own lives are in mortal danger. Because at least one person has been killed for knowing too much. And they know even more. From the streets of fifteenth-century Rome to the rarified realm of the Ivy League, from a shocking 500 year-old murder scene to the drama of a young man's coming of age, THE RULE OF FOUR takes us on an entertaining, illuminating tour of history--as it builds to a pinnacle of nearly unbearable suspense.

Customer Reviews:

Not with the paper it is written on!!.......2007-09-09

This is possible the worst written book I have every read. I am not even sure why I read the whole book. Its kind of like a train wreck, you just can't look away. Do yourself a favor and save your time and money. If you do own a copy send it back to the publisher.

OK.......2007-08-31

This book was OK. Reasonably well written, but not terrific. I read it primarily on a plane, and perhaps I would have gotten more from it had I been more focussed.

Pretty bad........2007-08-27

If you want to read a pamphlet about Princeton and all it has to offer, especially for pretentious, semi-intellectual frat boys, then this book is for you. Otherwise do not waste your time, this operates under the guise of a mystery, when it's more comparable to "Saved by the Bell, The College Years."

Not the DaVinci code. Don't judge it as such........2007-08-15

I think that many people have found this book lacking for one simple reason: they expected it to be the DaVinci code. This book doesn't lead you through the mystery, but makes you work for it through tangential thought processes just like the human brain operates. So it takes work to get through, and in the mean time you learn the struggles of the characters through the inimitable point of view of Tom, the books/hero and secondary tragedy.

Why isn't it as well loved as it's contemporary? It's simple--it's not straight forward. Like a good LeCarre novel you've got to work through it, stick with it, and except that the authors are going to take you where they want you to go, before they send you where you want to go. In true literary fashion, the story mirrors the hypnoteromachia poliphili, (the search for love in a dream) which I think explains why so much of the story has a dreamlike quality to it. There are four people all simultaneously trying to be and grow together, and that creates turmoil--no matter what.

I hope that anyone who reads this book comes to it with an open mind instead of already writing it off as another fast-paced historical mystery thriller. It's not.

Not as good as Dan Brown, But good in its own right.......2007-08-09

If you are looking for something to hold you over until the next Dan Brown book comes out this will work, its good and suspenseful. I just don't feel like I am getting to know the characters as well as I do in Dan Brown's books. See it is written in the voice of one college boy narrating the story, and I feel like I want to know what the others are thinking. It is still a good read though!

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A Magnificent Guide
Interesting Introduction to a Strange Work
Brilliant

The Real Rule of Four
Joscelyn Godwin
Manufacturer: Disinformation Company
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 1932857087

Book Description

Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason's The Rule of Four is already a bookselling phenomenon. The Ivy League super-achievers drew upon an authentic 1499 Renaissance text to create their thriller about two Princeton undergraduates who try to unravel the mysteries of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili (pronounced "HIP-ne-RO-to-MA-kia PO-li-FEE-li").

The Hypnerotomachia Poliphiliis an erotic, pagan epic, written in a private language peppered with words taken from Latin and Greek and decorated with Egyptian hieroglyphs. It was not translated into English for 500 years, until 1999, when Joscelyn Godwin finally achieved that near-impossible task.

In The Real Rule of Four, Professor Godwin carefully investigates each aspect of the history of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili and its use in The Rule of Four, including:

What is the Hypnerotomachia?
Who wrote the Hypnerotomachia? (A central theme of The Rule of Four)
What does the Hypnerotomachia mean?
Places and people in The Rule of Four
Glossary of names and terms in The Rule of Four

Lavishly illustrated with reproductions of the many beautiful woodcuts in the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili, a fold-out color map and photographs of the featured locations at Princeton University, The Real Rule of Four is an indispensable guide to the many fans of Caldwell and Thomason's best-selling novel.

Joscelyn Godwin was a scholar of Magdalene College, Cambridge, and holds a PhD from Cornell University. Since 1971 he has taught at Colgate University, where he is a professor of music. In 1999 Godwin published the first complete English translation of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili, called "a masterpiece of clarity and scholarship" by Andrew Graham-Dixon in the London Daily Telegraph. Godwin's other books include Harmonies of Heaven and Earth, Music and the Occult, Arktos: The Polar Myth, The Theosophical Enlightenment and The Pagan Dream of the Renaissance.

Customer Reviews:

A Magnificent Guide.......2005-08-03

Any best-seller nowadays can be expected to generate a side industry of books, films, computer games, plastic toys and so on, trying to capitalize on the success of the original. It would be a great mistake, however, to dismiss Joscelyn Godwin's magnificent guide as just a spin-off from the success of the Rule of Four. For one thing, its author not only follows but also preceded the novel, because as author of the only modern English translation of Francesco Colonna's Hypnerotomachia Poliphili he provided the best source of knowledge of the inspiration for the Rule of Four available to people who don't read mediaeval Italian.

It would have been easy, and perhaps tempting, for a scholar of Godwin's knowledge and ability to be patronizing about the Rule of Four, concentrating on correcting its errors and misinterpretations and on displaying his own superior understanding of the Hypnerotomachia, but Godwin does not do that. On the contrary, his attitude to the novel is thoroughly generous and positive. He starts by assuring us that the Hypnerotomachia is a real book, not a fictional invention of Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason, explains its importance in the history of typography and erotic literature, and describes what it is all about. He goes on to analyse the structure -- unusually complex for a popular novel -- of the Rule of Four, and to examine the evidence for the identity of the real author of the Hypnerotomachia. In this his conclusion is different from that reached in the Rule of Four, but he does not dismiss other possibilities as absurd. He describes the historical context in which the Hypnerotomachia was written, including the famous "bonfire of the vanities" of Savonarola. Finally he analyses what the Hypnerotomachia is really all about, and explains all the literary, historical and geographical name-dropping that occurs in the Rule of Four.

All in all, this is an indispensable guide, written by an outstanding expert, for anyone interested in reading the Rule of Four in more than the most superficial way.

Interesting Introduction to a Strange Work.......2005-05-02

Joscelyn Godwin has published a number of excellent books, the most important of which is probably his first ever English translation of the famous and mysterious Renaissance epic, the "Hypnerotomachia Poliphili". This book, with its clouded origins and hidden meaning, forms the basis of the novel "The Rule of Four" which has managed to work itself onto bestseller lists on the coattails of "The Da Vinci Code", though its obscure esocteric subject is much less controversial. Here Godwin explores the origins and authorship of the "Hypnerotomachia" in detail for the layreader and provides much interesting insight into this most beautiful and strange book.

The "Hypnerotomachia" was published in Venice by the famous Renaissance humanist printer Aldus Manutius in 1499 and has intrigued and confounded readers and scholars alike for 500 years. Godwin first gives an overview of the book's plot and discusses the 172 beautiful woodcut engravings that have made the book so fascinating to five centuries of readers. The book is filled with long and painstakingly detailed descriptions of architecture, statues, parades, ruins, pagan rituals, and beautiful, ethereal, naked nymphs and goddesses. In fact, it is this rather blatant erotic element that has certainly helped to make the book so popular. This scandalous aspect of the book made it so popular in fact, that today it is almost impossible to find original copies with all of its engravings intact or without censorship. Godwin also discusses at length the controversy regarding the authorship of the tome, today largely accepted by scholars and historians as the Venetian monk Francesco Colonna. "The Rule of Four", Godwin points out, makes great use of fictional elements of the famous book, inventing codes and ciphers that are reputed to hide secret knowledge in its voluminous pages. Godwin emphasizes that despite these fictional inventions that help make "The Rule of Four" entertaining, the real Hypnerotomachia is just as interesting without them.

Godwin has written an engaging and accessible book on a difficult and bizarre work. He has helped to clear up many of the mysteries that have clouded the famous book and its author and given fans of "The Rule of Four" more detail and information on the events, places, and people found in that novel. This book is a must for anyone who enjoyed "The Rule of Four" and is looking to delve deeper into the strange world of Poliphilo and his dream quest for the elusive Polia.

Brilliant.......2005-01-04

Perhaps Professor Godwin ought to have written the novel himself! Certainly, by translating into English the entire text of the "Hypnoerotomachia Poliphilli", he was the condicio sine qua non for "The Rule of Four". I recommend this guide wholeheartedly, it is brilliant.

The Stanley Catalog Collection 1855-1898: Four Decades of Rules, Levels, Try-Squares, Planes, and Other Stanley Tools and Hardware

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The Stanley Catalog Collection 1855-1898: Four Decades of Rules, Levels, Try-Squares, Planes, and Other Stanley Tools and Hardware

Manufacturer: Astragal Pr
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Reference | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 1879335743

Book Description

A valuable historical and collectorUs reference that contains complete reprints of seven of the most important 19th century Stanley catalogs: the 1855, 1859, 1867, 1870-71, 1879, 1888, and 1898. All are fully indexed and bound into one volume, allowing the reader to follow product development of this world leader in hand tools. A most useful reference and checklist. 390 pages. Hundreds of illustrations. 6" x 9". Soft cover.

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Definitely not a thriller
as bad as it can get
Nothing to do with the Da Vinci Code
Don't mistake this as a "Da Vinci Code" knock-off
thumbs up

The Rule of Four
Ian Caldwell , and Dustin Thomason
Manufacturer: Arrow Books Ltd
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Contemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
ASIN: 0099451956

Customer Reviews:

Definitely not a thriller.......2007-08-23

I have a problem with reading something half-way and leaving it unfinished, which is why I decided to read the book to the end while I was uninterested. I was uninterested, though, because from the very first chapter it became clear that the book was not a thriller, which is what I was expecting.

180 pages into the book, I began reading it for the story, whatever it might be. It turns out the book is pretty good once you get past the genre miscategorization. As one of the other reviewers said, it's more a book about friendship. The Hypnerotomachia was more of a catalyst than the focus of the book, which is one of the main ways in which the Brown books and this book differ.

Now, I read novels for entertainment and am therefore not particularly critical of the style, but a few things did bother me; to avoid spoilers, I won't get into them here. Still, they weren't deal breakers. If you're reluctant to read the book, forget about The Da Vinci Code comparison and buy a used copy.

as bad as it can get.......2006-11-22

Others that gave 1 star (and I agree, I would love to give a negative rating) have said it all, but to strentghen their efforts in warning others, here's my contribution: this book contains a childish idea, average high-school level of writing, and a few pages copied from history books.
It is certainly one of the worst books I have ever read. And the only reason I'll try to remember the names of the authors of The Rule of Four is to avoid their next book.

Nothing to do with the Da Vinci Code.......2006-02-26

I have to agree with most of the reviewers, this book is NOTHING to do with the Da Vinci Code. It is basically a story about love. Love between son and father, love between friends, love between man and woman and overall love between man and his obsession. If the authors would've stuck to that, than this might have been a good book. Unfortunately, for some reason ( I suspsect it's a lot of greenbacks), they tried to make a suspense story out of it. Here they utterly and completely failed. In fact the book reads like it was first written as an interesting book about relationships detailed above, with a small twist of renaissance riddle added. Then someone came and re-edited the whole thing adding a couple of murders with no appearent reason at all (again I suspect, to get the book to sell better after seeing the run-away success of the Da Vinci Code)The result is a totally misguided, hihgly unreadable mess.

Do not buy it if you like books by Dan Brown. In fact do not read it at all, whatever books you like.

Don't mistake this as a "Da Vinci Code" knock-off.......2006-02-06

Inaptly compared to the puzzle-fests published by Dan Brown, or incorrectly labeled as more educated versions of them, "Rule of Four" is something else entirely. On its surface, "Rule" is the story of four young men - the narrator and his three roommates at Princeton - whose fates are tied to the cryptic prose of the renaissance novel Hypneteramchia (okay, I can't possibly have spelled that right - can I just call it The Book?). It's the eve of Easter, 1999. Princeton Grad students have put the finishing touches on their theses or dissertations and for many it's time to hang back and delve into the absurdities of College life - pledging or "bickering" for a place in one of Princeton's student dinner clubs, playing laser-tag in the labyrinth below Princeton, the nude Olympics or one of an endless array of student pranks.

For others, it's a painful time to put aside the past of a student and embrace an unforgiving adulthood - a path that may require rethinking loyalties. For our four heroes, it's time to solve The Mystery of The Book. Meandering, confusing and sometimes just plain mad, the centuries old book has eluded the understanding of generations of scholars, save only that its lines contain clues to a great secret. The Book, however, is largely a McGuffin - we do see much of it, but the book itself is only an object that has consumed the characters therein. Besides Tom and his four friends, there is Vincent Tate, a once up-and-coming scholar now a grizzled professor whose life petered out against unreachable expectation; Richard Curry, once Tate's friend, now bitter rival - he's a more sympathetic character, or at least appears to be; then there's Tom's father, who was ready to give his life for the book. Tom's friends are Charlie, a hard working tough guy on his way to med school; Gil, a well-connected future banker; and Paul who has dared to plumb The Book and thus join the endless battle between Curry and Tate. Paul has an intriguing theory about the book - its origins and purpose, and the true identity of its enigmatic author. Soon the mystery takes on a life all of its own - a murder is committed, and the exercise becomes more than academic.

Rather than a straight dissection of The Book, "Rule" is actually a good case study of the lives of the four friends and the feuding academics trying to fight their ceaseless war of wits through them. At times self-absorbed with the four students, the wonders of academic life and the arcane society of Princeton, the book loses its focus. It's actually at its least compelling when Tom is most deeply steeped in The Book (which is also when it raises the necessary question of how our heroes can decipher a book that has frustrated centuries worth of decryption). Both the mystery of The Book and the one the authors build around it are unsatisfying.

Near the end however, something magical happens - Tom frees himself from the riddles of The Book, and "Rule" gets back to being a great story about friends and for those who stuck with it, "The Rule of Four" proves that it need not be compared to "Da Vinci Code". Authors Caldwell & Thomason develop complex threads linking what would otherwise be disparate characters, making decryption of the book the last thing anybody cares about. In the hands of a shallower author, Gil - with his privileged upbringing - would be an easy villain; Charlie, with his more working-class origins, would exist only as a noble sidekick; and Paul would be an academic joke. Instead, like The Book, they each have a puzzle to be solved. Towards the end, an older Tom, ensconced in a lucrative but lifeless job in perpetually sunny Texas, remarks that a cold night makes one think of crawling into bed with somebody, while those in snow-less Texas make it easy to sleep alone. At its best, "Rule" informs that distinction - ennobling the habit of making friends and sharing secrets. If a lame mystery that avoids the bombast of Dan Brown, "Rule" demonstrates convincing and compelling characters and consistent themes. The authors display a way with words and people that overcomes its slim plot. When you need to take a break from the repetitive thrills of Dan Brown's latest iteration of "Da Vinci Code", grab "The Rule of Four".

thumbs up.......2005-12-29

I enjoyed the writing and the puzzles were interesting.

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The Rule of Four
Ian Caldwell , and Dustin Thomason
Manufacturer: Simon & Schuster Audio
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Audio CD

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The Rule of Four

ASIN: 0743552121

Book Description

THE RUNAWAY NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER AT A NEW LOW PRICE!

THE RULE OF FOUR
Ian Caldwell & Dustin Thomason
Read by Josh Hamilton

It's Easter at Princeton and two students, Tom Sullivan and Paul Harris, are a hair's breadth from solving the mysteries of the Hypnerotomachia Poliphili -- a renowned text attributed to an Italian nobleman, a work that has baffled scholars since its publication in 1499. But as their deadline looms, research has stalled -- until a long-lost diary surfaces with a vital clue. And when a fellow researcher is murdered just hours later, Tom and Paul realize that they are not the first to glimpse the Hypnerotomachia's secrets.

Book Description

In this provocative new book, the acclaimed author of Holy Days, Lis Harris, offers a fascinating look at the institution of marriage: how it is changing, what it may yet become. Rules of Engagement follows the trials and triumphs of four very real couples:
-- upper-class Sarah and Eaton, whose 1950s marriage has been transformed in the wake of feminism;
-- working-class Mike and Claire, who have struggled through multiple separations and reconciliations in their common-law marriage;
-- middle-class African-Americans Carlita and Samuel, striving to succeed with their two young children in an often hostile world;
-- and middle-aged Neal and Vera, idealists whose relationship has survived an experiment with "open marriage."

From these four couples, Harris draws invaluable lessons about relationships in general and about the unique nature of American marriage, an institution that continues to thrive in an ever-changing world because of our willingness to experiment with and reinvent it.

Customer Reviews:

unique view into the inner workings of marriage.......2004-07-20

In this book, Lis Harris takes the readers into the lives of four couples - an affluent couple, a blue-collar couple, an African American couple, and a bohemian couple.

What was most refreshing was that Harris told the stories of unexceptional families, the type that can be most interesting, yet are so infrequently covered. Her focus was on how couples lived and related on a day to day basis - from the division of household responsibilities, to planning for the futures, their sex lives, and their relations with their parents and children.

Interspersed between the stories was information about the role of women and the institution of marriage throughout history.

The reason I didn't give it five stars was that Harris piqued my interest in issues such as gender roles and division of responsibilities, but left these four middle-aged New York-area couples as examples without including more hard data. I would have liked the factual sections expanded to include statistics from the fields of sociology and public policy, moving beyond the history of marriage to probe a bit deeper into what is going on today and why things are changing they way they are.

A unique book worth reading to see beyond the facades of marriages and glimpse how different couples handle the challenges of building a family.

Marriages are as varied as the people in them.......1997-11-21

A cogent, sharply observed, and thoughtful book, it held my interest all the way through. Lis Harris leavens her interviews with four couples of widely divergent social milieux with a well-researched exploration of historic American attitudes towards marriage. My one criticism is that her understanding of the first couple showed greater depth, perhaps because she belongs to their social class.

2007 Annual Book of ASTM Standards; Section Four: Construction; Volume 04.08; Soil and Rock (I): D420-D5611

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2007 Annual Book of ASTM Standards; Section Four: Construction; Volume 04.08; Soil and Rock (I): D420-D5611
ASTM
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
ASIN: B000URK5LC

Product Description

ISBN 0803143388; ASTM Stock # S040807

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