Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts Workbook for Men: Seven Questions to Ask Beforeand AfterYou Marry

Book Description

This revised workbook is designed to help the man explore the issues and practice the skills presented in Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts. Full of lively exercises and enlightening self-tests that will help you and your partner apply what you are learning directly to your relationship, this version of the workbook approaches the issues from a man's perspective. Each exercise includes an estimate of how long it will take, so you can easily fit the program into a busy schedule. Call-outs in the book let you know the best times to do the exercises as you read.

Customer Reviews:

Learning about each other.......2007-01-10

You will definitely need the actual book to use the workbooks. My fiance and I have been working through the lessons and are about halfway through the workbooks. The best thing about the exercises is that there are so many things about my future wife that I didn't know, especially in regards to how she thinks and feels about certain aspects of life. We are becoming closer as we're beginning to understand each other at a deeper level. I'm learning more about how women communicate and how they really aren't able to come to grips with exactly how we operate either. The exercises vary from childhood influences to budgeting to love languages. We look forward to each time we work through the lessons. I highly recommend them for any couple preparing for marriage.

The Sweet Potato Queens' Field Guide to Men: Every Man I Love Is Either Married, Gay, or Dead

Average customer rating:

Essential Information for the Aspiring Queen
Another boring rehash
FEEL BETTER LADIES! This is just fun...in book form.
Just didn't have the old magic
Very Funny

The Sweet Potato Queens' Field Guide to Men: Every Man I Love Is Either Married, Gay, or Dead
Jill Conner Browne
Manufacturer: Three Rivers Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Humor | Entertainment | Subjects | Books

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ASIN: 1400049687
Release Date: 2004-10-05

Book Description

If the Nobel committee offered awards in Gender Relations, the Sweet Potato Queens would have the prize all locked up. These fine ladies have devoted an absolutely inordinate amount of time to the pursuit of love, marriage, and great sex, and they’re just bursting to share their stories. Now their royal ringleader, bestselling author Jill Conner Browne, brings you The Sweet Potato Queens’ Field Guide to Men, a hilarious (and highly instructive) handbook about the men we love to hate, and the ones we love to love, with special revelations about:

Why he didn’t call
The sweetest revenge ever
The downright crazy things we will do for romance

Plus, memorable tales of Queenly dating adventures, the shameless lowdown on looking as young as you feel, and more royal recipes that are guaranteed to bring him home each and every night.

Download Description

Why he didn’t call

The sweetest revenge ever

The downright crazy things we will do for romance

Plus, memorable tales of Queenly dating adventures, the shameless lowdown on looking as young as you feel, and more royal recipes that are guaranteed to bring him home each and every night.

Customer Reviews:

Essential Information for the Aspiring Queen.......2007-02-16

Chock full of valuable and knowledgeable advice about male and female foibles. The story about the "lip extender" had me laughing so hard there were tears pouring down my face. Shorter than the others, lamentably, what were you THINKING, Jill???

Another boring rehash.......2006-08-30

Yet another forum for the author to rehash the "good old days" give her wannabes their 15 minutes of fame. I don't understand why someone who is an inspirational speaker and talented writer would travel this path.

FEEL BETTER LADIES! This is just fun...in book form........2005-12-30

There is really nothing At ALL WRONG IN HAVING A GOOD TIME,and this gal is doing her best to have a genu-wine helluva good time of life. If you have never celebrated just being a woman, do read her work. And if you have been born in the southern states, you will rather relate, even if you were born on the GREEN side of town, you freaks like myself will feel some (sanctimonius) maybe? relating, and you will laugh! I would rather like to be her friend, so that I could get a little dose of her fun, and she might get a bit more, my compassion for the human delimma.
(I have a hard time using people, whether they are aware of it, or not) ~but still understand!

Men! You guys can really be a big ol' CAN-O-WORMS...and you know it!
And this gal Jill is just putting that knowledge out there, in the form of one rowdy southern belle's opinion, and it is great fun to read about it! This girl could cheer up Eyore!

And yes I know that it is wrong to call a full grown woman a girl but some of us, we'll just never lose that spirit, and that is when you can do so correctly...politically or just socially, I for one, will never be too old to be a "girl" nor will Miss Jill Browne. This is a fun romp through the thoughts of a true (American as apple pie) sister!
Actual recipes are included in this book as well.
"Lighthearted romp" of a book.

Just didn't have the old magic.......2005-11-26

My wife and I have loved the Sweet Potato Queen books from the beginning. Reading them together became something of a ritual for us. This book, however, left us both rather disappointed.

Jill Conner Browne is a very talented writer, no question about that, and her latest book did offer several laugh-out-loud moments. Her descriptions of the various types of men (and the women who are involved with them) was very funny. She devoted one brief chapter to explaining why "he" didn't call, which combined humor and down-home good sense as only the SPQ can do.

However, Conner-Browne's distinctive literary voice has changed over the years, and not for the better. In one chapter she goes on endlessly about her plastic surgery experience, from which she recuperates with a shopping spree. In another section, she describes her experience with acuptuncture, blissfully glossing over the expense of it. Previously, the SPQ came across as folksy and full of love-for-life. In discussing her high-priced indulgences, however, she comes across as spoiled and decadent. This kind of self-worshipping prattle distances her from those of us who don't have endless piles of money, and frankly makes her book less enjoyable to read.

Mind you, this doesn't mean that the latest SPQ book isn't worth reading. My wife and I agreed that we were both glad we read it. However, we also agreed that compared to the previous books in the series, it just wasn't as good.

Very Funny.......2005-10-10

Another hit in the series. The wife just loved it. Highly recommended!

Sentimental Education (Penguin Classics)

Average customer rating:

Flaubert's Sentimental Education: one reason why life's worth living.
A novel about unfulfilled promise
The Best Novel to Come Out of Second Empire France
A brilliant novel by the author of Madame Bovary is a tour de force of mid -19th century French fiction
A "Regular People" Review

Sentimental Education (Penguin Classics)
Gustave Flaubert
Manufacturer: Penguin Classics
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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ASIN: 0140447970

Book Description

Based on Flaubert's own youthful passion for an older woman, Sentimental Education was described by its author as “the moral history of the men of my generation.” It follows the amorous adventures of Frederic Moreau, a law student who, returning home to Normandy from Paris, notices Mme Arnoux, a slender, dark woman several years older than himself. It is the beginning of an infatuation that will last a lifetime. He befriends her husband, an influential businessman, and as their paths cross and re-cross over the years, Mme Arnoux remains the constant, unattainable love of Moreau's life. Blending love story, historical authenticity, and satire, Sentimental Education is one of the great French novels of the nineteenth century.

Customer Reviews:

Flaubert's Sentimental Education: one reason why life's worth living. .......2007-10-05

"I want to write the moral history of the men of my generation-- or, more accurately, the history of their feelings. It's a book about love, about passion; but passion such as can exist nowadays--that is to say, inactive." --Flaubert on Sentimental Education.

Best known for his novel, Madame Bovary, Gustave Flaubert's (1821-1880) last novel, Sentimental Education (L'Éducation sentimentale, 1869) is not only my favorite Flaubert novel, but one of my all-time favorite novels. Drawn from Flaubert's personal experience (and youthful passions) and set in Paris from 1833 to 1869, it describes the life of Frédéric Moreau and his enduring love for an older, slender, dark woman, Madame Arnoux. Wheras Frédéric is an impoverished law student from provincial France, Mme [Marie] Arnoux is the married mother of two children, who moves to Rome by the end of the novel. Throughout the novel, Frédéric is more interested in experiencing intimacy with Mme Arnoux than his studies. She becomes a symbol of unattainable love, and for Frédéric the path to disillusionment, making this one of the greatest coming-of-age stories of all time. Flaubert was a man of letters who earned his living by the sweat of his brow, known for laboring an entire week over a single page of his writing. He despised clichés and inexact phrases. All of this is apparent when reading Sentimental Education, which in my opinion is a perfect novel. Is Sentimental Education worth reading? Well, Woody Allen fans may remember that his character in Manhattan included this novel as one of his reasons why life's worth living.

G. Merritt

A novel about unfulfilled promise .......2006-09-11

The personal story of Frederick Moreau and the political setting of mid-19th century Paris reflect one another in the unfulfilled promise of his obsession with a married woman and the revolution's unfulfilled promise of reform and change.

The novel offers little in the way of character development and that may be the entire point. Since Moreau's sentimental obsession with Madame Arnoux drives the action to a large degree and he never lets go of it despite his experience he is a study in arrested development. He lives through tulmutuous times , witnesses fortunes made and lost and yet in the end returns with his boyhood friend to where he began and seems to have absorbed no lesson from any of it.
Flaubert's prose is eloquent and at times incredibly poetic in it's descriptions of settings and expression of feelings and the translation here is excellent.

The Best Novel to Come Out of Second Empire France.......2006-08-23

Even better than "Madame Bovary", this is the best novel to emerge from Second Empire France. A story of youthful dreams dashed and great expectations frustrated, this is Flaubert's attempt to tell the moral history of his generation, a generation that saw its hopes raised by the revolution of 1848 and then dashed by the the Napoleonic coup d'etat that established the (at first very popular) Second Empire of Napoleon III. But it's much, much more than a political or moral novel. This is one of Western literature's great explorations of love as desire and disappointment, love as frustration. The erotic, as in Stendhal's "Charterhouse of Parma," parallels the political. The hopes of the best will always be frustrated, but we are doomed to live, condemned (in the words of that great Flaubertian, Jean-Paul Sartre) to be free. Flaubert concludes that the happiest moment in a man's life comes before he is even a man, when his illusions remain intact, before he crosses the threshold into his first brothel. The brothel, then, becomes Flaubert's ultimate metaphor for our prostituted world.

A brilliant novel by the author of Madame Bovary is a tour de force of mid -19th century French fiction.......2006-08-04

This novel was published in 1869 by Gustave Flaubert and was
always fated to play second fiddle to Madame Bovary. The novel
tells the story of Fred Moreau (something of a male Madame Bovary whose heart, heart and life are filled with whimsical
daydreams of fame, fortune and love). Morea has an unfulfilled lust for the rich and married Madame Arnoux. His quixotic quest of this very ordinary woman is told as social comedy, satire and
wit by the brilliant Flaubert.
Moreau pursues several wisps in the wind of his ambitions:
He dreams of becoming:
a lawyer; a politician; a novelist; a rich aristocrat with a
beautiful wife and home in the provinces and a world traveller.
He achieves nothing in his wasted life running through a huge
inheritance on wine, women and song. The complications he involves himself in with prostitutes, middle class ladies
and wealthy women provide wheel within wheel for those readers
who enjoy soap opera shenanigans.
The book has a huge ensemble cast and it is sometimes hard to keep the characters apart. Long discussions are held concerning
every topic imaginable from social structure, French politics,
art and literature. I found it best to forget the somewhat static plot and let the impressionistic strokes by Flaubert
help me paint a mental picture of post-Revolutionary Paris.
This book takes some getting used to but it is worthwhile if
the patient reader will let his/her mind be guided by the master
novelist.
This book was loved by Franz Kafka and reminded me of the work
of Balzac and Marcel Proust.
The introduction in the Penguin Edition as well as the translation is well done,

A "Regular People" Review.......2005-11-24

This book is great, easy to understand by the average person, the plot moves along at a good pace and the ending is very good. You need to read this book...and keep me updated!

The Other Woman's Guide to and from Infidelity: The Journal for Women in Affairs With Married Men

Average customer rating:

This is a must have for anyone in an extramarital affair
Helpful Guide
disappointing

The Other Woman's Guide to and from Infidelity: The Journal for Women in Affairs With Married Men
Elissa Gough
Manufacturer: Face Reality
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Interpersonal Relations | Relationships | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books

General | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books

General | Reference | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 1891863037

Book Description

Face Reality Self-Reflecting Journals present proven ways of coping with betrayal for individuals affected in a variety of ways - spouse or partner, child or other family member, the "other man" or the "other woman," or the gay or lesbian lover. You'll learn what motivates betrayal and how to prevent it. A significant portion of each journal is devoted to suggestions on how to identify a troubled marriage or relationship and what can be done to restore it.

These materials are in no way a substitute for counseling and/or therapy. They act as their companions.

Customer Reviews:

This is a must have for anyone in an extramarital affair.......2003-03-01

I have been involved with a married man for almost 7 years and had two children with him. This journal was amazing for me. I thought I was the only woman who had been through an affair and felt the way I felt. I was so wrong! I highly recomend this journal but only if you are ready for soul searching.

Helpful Guide.......2000-10-04

Unlike the last reviewer, I found this to be a helpful guide. I read Ms. Gough's book as well and I think one thing Ms. Gough seems to pride herself on is that she is not here to tell us what to do, but instead to give us information to help us make our own decisions. I didn't expect the journal to tell me whether or not it was right or wrong for me to be with my married lover.

Instead, it gave me a chance to express my feelings and then be able to go back and reflect on them at a later date so I could make my own decisions about what I wanted out of this relationship and my life. I took it with me to my therapist several times, and she also thought it was helpful.

I thought that this was a great way to journal, I am a person who has always wanted to journal, but needed some kind of structure to help me along with the process. I would definitely recommend this journal.

disappointing.......2000-02-22

I expected more information than this book gave. I believe journaling is good to do, but without a therapist to keep you honest, it's very easy to write denials, fantasies and justifications. This book does not help the other woman whose relationship IS moving forward toward breakup of his marriage and probable union afterward. I would have liked more information on how to tell the difference between if it's real or a big mistake. There is just not enough information and mostly blank pages. Save your money and get a blank book from the dollar store...

Average customer rating:

the bad times are coming, and the stream-lined men are coming too.
Well Worth Reading, With Reservations
In Search of Lost Time
Prescient musings as the world comes apart
Orwell's ordinary man

Coming Up for Air (Harvest Book)
George Orwell
Manufacturer: Harvest Books
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Classics | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

ASIN: 0156196255

Amazon.com

Insurance salesman George "Fatty" Bowling lives with his humorless wife and their two irritating children in a dull house in a tract development in the historyless London suburb of West Bletchley. The year is 1938; doomsayers are declaring that England will be at war again by 1941.

When George bets on an unlikely horse and wins, he finds himself with a little extra cash on his hands. What should he spend it on? "The alternatives, it seemed to me, were either a week-end with a woman or dribbling it quietly away on odds and ends such as cigars and double whiskeys." But a chance encounter with a poster in Charing Cross sets him off on a tremendous journey into his own memories--memories, especially, of a boyhood spent in Lower Binfield, the country village where he grew up. His recollections are pungent and detailed. Touch by touch, he paints for us a whole world that is already nearly lost: a world not yet ruled by the fear of war and not yet blighted by war's aftermath:

1913! My God! 1913! The stillness, the green water, the rushing of the weir! It'll never come again. I don't mean that 1913 will never come again. I mean the feeling inside you, the feeling of not being in a hurry and not being frightened, the feeling you've either had and don't need to be told about, or haven't had and won't ever have the chance to learn.

Alas, George finds that even Lower Binfield has been darkened by the bomber's shadow.

Readers of 1984 will recognize Orwell's desperate insistence on the importance of the individual, of memory, of history, and of language; and they will find in Fatty Bowling one of Orwell's most engaging creations--a warm, witty, thinking, remembering Everyman in a world that is fast learning not to think and not to remember, and thus swiftly losing its mind. --Daniel Hintzsche

Book Description

George Bowling, the hero of this comic novel, is a middle-aged insurance salesman who lives in an average English suburban row house with a wife and two children. One day, after winning some money from a bet, he goes back to the village where he grew up, to fish for carp in a pool he remembers from thirty years before. The pool, alas, is gone, the village has changed beyond recognition, and the principal event of his holiday is an accidental bombing by the RAF.

Download Description

The idea really came to me the day I got my new false teeth. I remember the morning well. At about a quarter to eight I'd nipped out of bed and got into the bathroom just in time to shut the kids out. It was a beastly January morning, with a dirty yellowish-grey sky. Down below, out of the little square of bathroom window, I could see the ten yards by five of grass, with a privet hedge round it and a bare patch in the middle, that we call the back garden. There's the same back garden, some privets, and same grass, behind every house in Ellesmere Road. Only difference- where there are no kids there's no bare patch in the middle. I was trying to shave with a bluntish razor-blade while the water ran into the bath. My face looked back at me out of the mirror, and underneath, in a tumbler of water on the little shelf over the washbasin, the teeth that belonged in the face. It was the temporary set that Warner, my dentist, had given me to wear while the new ones were being made. I haven't such a bad face, really. It's one of those bricky-red faces that go with butter-coloured hair and pale-blue eyes. I've never gone grey or bald, thank God, and when I've got my teeth in I probably don't look my age, which is forty-five.

Customer Reviews:

the bad times are coming, and the stream-lined men are coming too........2005-12-29

perfection is this: thinking about writing an amazon book review and simultaneously coming across a line that sums up a book nearly perfectly (see title).

orwell is magical when it comes to sliding down the slippery slope with passion, terror and vigor. this book is quite different. it is slow and melodic...the tone is cozy and nostalgic with random bits of sardonic bitterness...and hardly is there a theme, but perhaps this: "everything will always be the same and everything is constantly changing."

george bowling is a middle-aged suburban wash up who hates life, lightly reminisces about his time during world war i and the beauty and purity of his long forgotten childhood. the story takes place at the onset of wwii and george decides to revisit the place where he grew up in order to "come up for air" and remember what the good life used to be.

throughout the book, he teeters between optimism and dark despair...hatred and whimsical glory...esteem and self loathing...etc. the book is entertaining with fantastic imagery and offers a single harrowing scene which might bring anyone who has not experienced the terror of war to tears. read this and you are guaranteed to laugh, smile, and get bored...but all worth it.

bravo, orwell. yet again.

Well Worth Reading, With Reservations.......2005-10-31

As seasoned readers know, your response to any work is a combination of its intrinsic merit and timing. Maybe this just wasn't the right time to read this novel. Maybe I'll come back at some future time to revisit this assessment.

It simply did not register with me as did Orwell's other, non-political fiction, including the charming Keep The Aspidistra Flying. Part of it, I believe, arises from the fact that the novel is written in the first-person, which can be limiting in that it restricts us to the narrator's vocabulary and deprives us of Orwell's magnificent facility with langauge.

Now, as to the novel's merits. George "Fatty" Bowles, who, having won 17 pounds on a horse race, decides to use his winnings to escape and reflect upon his life for a week -- or, as he puts it, "to come up for air" -- is an engaging everyman, a person in whom all we old, ossified married types see ourself, and he captures perfectly the horrible nexus between memory and desire that a man's fifth decade often is. As he visits the town of his birth to witness how time has effaced its charm, we are with him all the way. His reflection on the approaching war is both moving and memorable. Because the first world war did not happen on our shores, it's hard for us to imagine its impact on the English imagination as that nation anticipated a reprise of that horrific, generation-destroying event. Orwell captures this dreadful anticipation very convincingly.

Finally, there's this: among all the people who have ever struggled for the poor and the middle-class, Orwell seems to have struggled more earnestly, yet to have been exempt from the tendency to idealize the people he was trying to help. Bowles is no one's ideal; he's just pretty much everyone's reality. He is convincingly middle-classed.

It is, as all this indicates, a fine novel. It simply doesn't represent the author at the height of his ability.

In Search of Lost Time.......2005-10-16

George Bowling's life is pretty mundane even by his own admission: he has "settled down" into his middle age with his wife and two children, his mortgage and his steady yet uninteresting job. Frustrated, George looks back to the days of his childhood in a small town in rural England and asks where did it all go wrong? He tries to recapture those times, but can anyone really go home again?

This is a beautifully written, funny and at times poignant story. Orwell depicts (with great skill) the dangers of middle-age drift, and of trying to escape from it by revisiting a past which only exists inside your head. He takes a swipe at various irritating types (many of them still around) such as the "respectable" middle classes who believe they are living in the countryside and are protecting it when they are in fact doing neither.

It is interesting in that the feeling of decay, of falling standards seems to afflict each generation in turn. Although Bowling is careful not to idolise his past, pointing to the many faults of the society he grew up in, the novel does reveal that there is nothing new in nostalgia.

G Rodgers

Prescient musings as the world comes apart.......2004-10-22

It's a mark of great skill when an author - like George Orwell, as you may have guessed - can fit so much meaning into a story about so very little. Such is the case with Coming Up For Air. On the surface, there's not much here. In fact more than half of the book is taken up by a portly middle-aged insurance worker's reminiscences about his childhood. And it wasn't any sort of exciting childhood either, full of glory or high hopes or wretched poverty or any of the things that make life colorful for better or worse. It was a British, turn of the Century, solid lower middle class provincial childhood in a town somewhere. The narrator does this essentially on the eve of the Second World War as he goes through perhaps some sort of mid-life crisis, though that term is never used. Basically, the story can be summed up as a man trying to figure out what his life means and where it's going.

In that sense, Coming Up For Air probably has the least actual plot of any Orwell novel. But in his endless musings the reader becomes this man (George Bowling is his name, but since it's a first person narrative, it's hard to attach a name tag to the man even as we experience the world through his eyes). Orwell is, as far as the mechanics of writing goes, well into maturity here.

But beyond this sense of realism in musings and reminiscences, Orwell hits on a few themes. The more dominant one is, I suppose, the idea that you can never go home again. After extensively guiding us through his childhood, our hero decides the thing for him to do is to visit his childhood hometown, the place he hasn't been in twenty-five or so years. Naturally, everything has changed. Absolutely everything. Not for the better, or necessarily for the worse, but changed nonetheless. There is, written on top of this, a vague plot about how he's trying to keep the trip from his shrewish wife, lest she think he's cheating on her, but that is strictly secondary. Since so much of the tale is bound up in our narrator's emotional state and thoughts, there's little point in relating them here. Suffice it to say that he goes home with a clearer idea of who he is.

The other point, dwelt upon at some length, is his (and really Orwell's) thoughts on the coming war. The book was written and published just before World War Two, in 1938. If an author had written something like this in 1948, I would be tempted to knock off points for suggesting that someone could have correctly judged the scale of the coming conflict in such a way. But perhaps I would be wrong, because here is evidence that people really were expecting something big to come. This is not to say that Orwell correctly foresaw particular chronologies. He did, in fact, seem to think that Britain and the western world would have to become barbaric to defeat barbarism (hints of 1984). In this he turned out to be wrong. But as a reader born long after the conflict ended, I was amazed that something written beforehand could capture what I think of as the mood of hindsight, but in foresight. I suppose this is why Orwell is so respected as a writer and thinker.

Orwell's ordinary man.......2003-07-12

Coming up for Air is a refreshing look at life through the eyes of an ordinary, overweight middle-aged man. I wanted to comment on how the book made me think about how we should cherish those little things in life that we take for granted, it is an old message but this book made me realize it again. The plot is plain, no suspense or excitement whatsover, what the book does however is take you back to your own childhood and helps you think about those things that were important to you then.

There are many other issues that the book touches on, the escapism of some, the inevitability of change, the prison that is marriage etc...

I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to read something light and sentimental.

Average customer rating:

A Great Book!

Very Insightful

Understanding

worst book ever

I was the man...

An Affair of the Mind
Laurie Hall
Manufacturer: Tyndale House Publishers
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

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Similar Items:

Living with Your Husbands Secret Wars

Every Heart Restored: A Wife's Guide to Healing in the Wake of a Husband's Sexual Sin (The Every Man Series)

False Intimacy: Understanding the Struggle of Sexual Addiction

When His Secret Sin Breaks Your Heart

Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time (The Every Man Series)

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philosophy hope in a jar daily moisturizer

ASIN: 1561794643

Book Description

Laurie Hall's story reveals pornography's subversive side and offers comfort, encouragement, insight, and a plan of action to women whose husbands are addicted.

Customer Reviews:

A Great Book!.......2007-08-20

Laurie Hall has the boldness to talk about a topic some are ashame to discuss . I am sure her testimony will be a door for others .

Very Insightful.......2007-02-03

I found Ms. Hall's book to be very helpful and insightful. She provides excellent Christian guidance for working through this very serious marital issue with dignity and sanity intact. Her journey to a closer relationship with Jesus rings true with my own experience. I am thankful to Ms. Hall for sharing her story and highly recommend this book to others who are suffering (or have loved ones suffering) through the same nightmare.

Understanding.......2007-01-15

This is one of my favorite books of all time. It gives a deeper understanding of what is right and what is wrong with the sexual desires a person can have. It is looked at through a woman's point-of-view.

worst book ever.......2006-12-28

We were having problems, but this book only made them worse It makes any man
who ever looked at porn or been to bachlor party seem like a sex addict,
serial rapist, axe murderer, and an agent of the devil. This book will not help
only make convince a wife to seek a divorce.

I was the man..........2006-08-17

As I was seeking to recover from sexual addiction/bondage to pornography, this book showed me myself in the mirror and what had happened in my relationship with my wife and family over the years. The chapter on physical affects was an eye opener. This book helped me move from denial to recovery and four years later I am grateful to the author, God, 12-Step Recovery, and Battleplan Ministries for helping me find my way out of bondage.

The Secrets of Happily Married Men: Eight Ways to Win Your Wife's Heart Forever

Average customer rating:

Hope lives
An inspiring, practical book for men who want a better marriage!
Handy Guide for the Married Man
Positive review by a clinical psychologist
Highly Recommended by Christian Marriage Authors, Joel and Kathy Davisson

The Secrets of Happily Married Men: Eight Ways to Win Your Wife's Heart Forever
Scott Haltzman , and Theresa Foy DiGeronimo
Manufacturer: Jossey-Bass
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Marriage | Relationships | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books

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ASIN: 0787994146

Book Description

Praise for The Secrets of Happily Married Men

"Manly men rest assured: You can hope to become a better husband without having to get in touch with your feminine side. . . . Lively and entertaining, this broad guidebook provides Haltzman's insights illuminated by anecdotes from his online discussion forum for married men."
—Psychology Today

"Haltzman . . . launches his eight strategies with remarkable vigor. More important, they are extraordinarily well fleshed out and convincingly supported with useful 'to do' lists and a multitude of examples. They will no doubt prove helpful to many men struggling to build a happy marriage."
—Publisher's Weekly

"Scott Haltzman, a psychiatrist and Brown University professor, has been studying marriages good and bad for a long time. . . . View marriage as your most important task, Haltzman urges men, and pursue success as you would anything else that matters."
—Washington Post

"Men are good at fixing problems, not talking about them, so Haltzman advises playing to your strength. The genius of this book is that it . . . asks politically incorrect questions about men and women at home—the neglected front in the gender wars."
—New York Times

"The insights in this book reveal a new and effective way for men and women to understand and appreciate each other. It shows what it really takes to create a loving and lasting relationship."
—John Gray, author, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

Marriage and relationships are in crisis. The breakup and divorce rate remain incredibly high, despite all the couples therapy, afternoon talk shows, and other books in the marketplace, many of which describe men as abusive commitment phobic creeps who'd better change fast or else. But this new book is totally different, a whole different way of looking at how to build a successful long-lasting relationship from a man's point of view, men who are happy in their partnerships, who have figured out what works for them in accomplishing the goal of a loving, intimate, lifetime commitment. Dr. Scott Haltzman, Clinical Assistant Professor of Psychiatry and Human Behavior at Brown University, and founder of www.secretsofmarriedmen.com, has devised a proven method for improving relationships, based on a man's special and unique skills, strengths, powers—as a responsible and motivated worker, manager, leader, problem-solver, partner, husband, and father. Men are different, Dr. Haltzman says. They don't approach relationships with the same skills and techniques that women do—and viva la difference. Dr.Haltzman therefore lays out eight ways, tasks, proven techniques which men have revealed in confidential correspondence to his highly successful website, including The First Way: Make Your Marriage Your Job, The Second Way: Know Your Wife, The Third Way: Be Home Now, The Fourth Way: Expect Conflict and Deal With It, The Fifth Way: Learn to Listen, The Sixth Way: Aim to Please, The Seventh Way: Understand the Truth About Sex, The Eighth Way: Introduce Yourself, and finally, Celebrate Your Love. Within each of these steps, he provides both specific analysis, guidelines and techniques based on male biology, neuro-science, brain differences, unique developmental stages from youth to seniority. To illustrate these ideas in action, he's included wonderful true stories, anecdotes, and confessions from the website. The result is a practical, very entertaining, totally original way to build successful relationships for men and their partners, girlfriends, and wives. For a lasting commitment, a continuing guide to solving inevitable problems and bumps in the road, for more fun, better sex, genuine intimacy, and a life-long partnership—this dynamic new author shows the way in a manner that finally includes an authentic male perspective.

Customer Reviews:

Hope lives.......2007-09-19

It's wonderful to see a book that's so filled with hope and practical advice. Easy to read, and lots, I mean LOTS of helpful information.

An inspiring, practical book for men who want a better marriage!.......2007-07-26

I'm glad to see that more and more men are coming forward to challenge the stereotype of guys we see on TV who are boneheads when it comes to marriage. Dr. Haltzman explains in this great book that men DO have the ability to take a mediocre marriage and make it absolutely wonderful. If every married man read this book, the divorce rate would plummet and people would have very satisfying marriages...and there would be fewer kids traumatized by broken up families. I highly recommend that you buy this book for yourself, for engaged or newlywed men, and for anyone you know that has a stagnant marriage.

Handy Guide for the Married Man.......2007-06-11

An easy read! The type of book that you can read in any random order or a chapter at a time and pick up some very useful tips and guidelines to enhance your relationship with your wife. I am sure that I will keep this book around as a ready-reference to re-read from and get a deeper understanding.

Positive review by a clinical psychologist.......2007-05-23

Last week, Scott Haltzman gave a three hour talk to the San Diego Psychological Association, a group of clinical psychologists. I wasn't sure what to expect. He had appeared on national TV and radio, and he has a website. What I found online looked OK. At the same time, none of what I found appeared to distinguish him too clearly from anybody else who writes about successful marriages. The online advice seemed reasonable, and his credentials were striking, but I wondered if he could tell us anything new. (Many of us have training and experience in doing couples' therapy). There's so much out there that seems pretty good - Christensen and Jacobsen, Gottman, Hendrix, Schwartz, Bader, Solomon & Teagno, etc., etc. I've read quite a few books on the topic of successful marriages, and I feel like I have a decent sense of what is out there.

Fewer than 10 SDPA members showed for the continuing education talk, despite multiple announcements of this presentation. This was a bit surprising given the strength of Dr. Haltzman's credentials and his national reputation. Dr. Haltzman seemed OK with the low turnout, and used it as an opportunity to interact with his audience by asking and answering questions.

As he spoke, it quickly became obvious to me that this guy is an entertaining and dynamic speaker. Picture Bill Maher as a psychiatrist, with a genius for marriage therapy. At some point during the first hour, it hit me... This guy IS the real deal. He really IS passionate about saving marriages. He really DOES have a unique perspective that is informed by research. He integrates other experts' opinions with PLENTY of his own wisdom about marriage. Dr. Haltzman seems to exhibit a strong intuitive and analytical sense of what works in marriages. If I was married and having problems, I'd want someone like this guy to be my therapist. Dr. Haltzman's wisdom is the pearl of many years spent passionately immersed in this topic.

Others in the audience of licensed clinical psychologists had similar, very positive reactions. The anonymous reviews completed after his presentation were quite positive. Moreover, most members of the audience bought copies of his book after hearing his presentation. That was pretty unexpected! Two thumbs way up for this speaker and his book...

This review is a work in progress. I hope to write more about the actual book later. There's plenty of media and info online about this author. See, in particular, Tierney's NY Times article on this book.

Highly Recommended by Christian Marriage Authors, Joel and Kathy Davisson.......2007-05-16

We highly recommend this book. Scott has discovered many things in his practice that we have discovered in our experience and Bible study. If a man focuses on his marriage, he has the power to create an Outrageously Happy Marriage! Order this and then check out our two books, also on Amazon. Click on these links: The Man of Her Dreams The Woman of His! and The Man of Her Dreams The Woman of His 2 - Livin' It and Lovin' It! (Volume 2)

Joel and Kathy Davisson

Average customer rating:

Beautiful & moving story but lacked depth
Henry James with a homosexual twist
a most beautiful book
Not What I Expected
Not really worth reading

The Married Man
Edmund White
Manufacturer: Alfred A. Knopf
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover

Contemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

Literary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

ASIN: 0375400052
Release Date: 2000-05-30

Amazon.com

Edmund White majored in sexual explicitness with his boldly autobiographical trilogy--A Boy's Own Story, The Beautiful Room Is Empty, and The Farewell Symphony. Now, explicitly as ever, he trains his unflinching eye on a new subject: a young man's death from AIDS. Austin is a fiftysomething American expat in Paris; Julien is a young married man he meets at the gym. Much to Austin's surprise, Julien calls him and soon they are sharing a bed and a life. The Married Man is White's Henry James novel: the first couple hundred pages show us a satirical portrait of young Julien as a stuffy Frenchman and a more elliptical portrait of Austin's apprehension of French culture through his lover. With Julien, "Austin was always learning things, not necessarily reasoned or researched information but rather all those thousands and thousands of brand names, turns of phrase, aversions and anecdotes that make up a culture as surely as do the moves in a child's game of hopscotch."

But White wants to take us all the way to the end of this relationship. Austin is HIV positive, and it soon becomes clear that Julien has AIDS. As Julien's health unravels, the two travel to Providence, to Key West, to Venice, to Rome, and ultimately to Morocco. The author coins a darkly appropriate phrase for this urge to move: he calls it "AIDS-restlessness." White, in fact, unveils a whole gallery of startling images as Julien nears death. Julien is "the bowler hat descending into the live volcano." Thin and brown and bearded, he looks "like the Ottoman Empire in a turn-of-the-century political cartoon." Though he can't read it, Julien acquires a copy of the Koran. "It was the perfect book for a weary, dying man--pious, incomprehensible pages to strum, an ink cloud of unknowing." White has found a language both magical and clinical to describe a horrible death. --Claire Dederer

Book Description

Austin is an American furniture scholar living in Paris. He is pushing fifty, loveless, drifting. One day at the gym he meets Julien: French, an architect, much younger and married. Against every expectation, this chance acquaintance matures into profound romance.

As the two men dash between bohemian suppers and sophisticated salons, their only impediments are the easily surmountable and comic clashes of culture, age and temperament. Inevitably, however, Julien's past catches up with them. With increasing desperation, in a quest to save health and happiness, they move from the shuttered squares of Venice to sun-drenched Key West, to Montreal in the snow and Providence in the rain. But it is amid the bleak, baking sands of the Sahara that their love is pushed to its ultimate crisis.

Haunting and deeply moving, The Married Man carries the reader along with its protagonists into uncharted emotional territory, over the rim of love and loss. It is Edmund White's finest novel.

Customer Reviews:

Beautiful & moving story but lacked depth.......2004-11-29

Edmund White has written a very beautiful book on a very dark subject. I agree with most of the 5 star reviews that praised this book and the 2 star reviews that were disappointed with parts of this book. Yes, I am very conflicted about this book. I felt very cheated with the way this book ended. I actually kept looking over the blank pages at the end of the book to make sure an extra chapter or an epilogue wasn't accidently left out. I felt like I didn't get an ending at all. I know, I know, life isn't like that. It goes on and on no matter what tragedies happen in your life. And people do things with no explanations but I wanted an explanation, dang it! But maybe that's me. I read fiction because I want everything nice and neat. A reason for every action. I also wanted a happy ending as impossible as it might be in real life under these settings. I wanted that silver lining. That, I did not get. But I am not at all sorry that I read this book. Far from it, I recommend it. Just know that the ending is very unexpected. I expected it way before or else a reason for going on to that point.

Mr White is a very detailed story-teller full of rich descriptions and a very clear easy-to-picture images. But I never felt like I knew who the main character Austin was. I know what foods he served when he entertained but not how he felt about always being on the giving end. Austin's lover Julian I knew even less. How did Austin really feel about Julian? What did Julian really think about Austin? Sure, I knew all about the motions they went thru but the dialogue between them was lacking at best.

Both Austin and Julian seemed almost shallow only because I knew what clothes they wore more than what they really felt. This book read more like a non-fiction (detailed descriptions)than a fiction (detailed emotions and feelings). Heck, I knew more about how Austin felt about a past lover of his than how he really felt about his current lover who he was with all throughout this book.

When I finished reading the Married Man, I knew I enjoyed reading the book but I didn't have that satisfied full feeling. I felt cheated somehow. I wanted more revealing emotions. I want to write Mr White and ask him a million questions about Julian's motivation for his deception or his lack of explanations. Again, I know things in real life are not spelled out just as it was in this book and we should draw the obvious conclusions based on the few details and hints that were revealed to us. Julian would probably call me a spoiled lazy helpless American who has to be spoon-fed everything.

For those of you who would rather draw your own conclusions, connect your own dots and would consider it an insult to have to be spoon-fed the obvious will really devour The Married Man and the realistic story-telling of this exotic book.

On a pet-peeve side note: I really liked the hardback cover of the man and his dog.(It also relates to, and fits the overall mood of the story) I wish the cover art had not been changed on the paperback edition.

Henry James with a homosexual twist.......2004-10-23

Austin Smith has picked the wrong century to be a furniture scholar and intellectual. He's pushing fifty, lacking direction, and his biggest claim to fame is hosting parties for the Parisian youth in his apartment on the Île St. Louis, or irritating PC maniac students of American universities. His largest commitment in life is to his former lover Peter, dying of AIDS. Until he meets younger married architect Julien, whose lack of known-last-name typifies his character. He is an enigma for much of the book, steadfast only in his devotion to his secrets and to Austin, to whom he says during an intimate pillow-talk session, "I chose you, Petit, and after that there were no other choices to make." The master of artifice who dislikes American big-toothed girls, Julien shows depth by telling Austin, when he discovers Austin's HIV status, "I'm going to stay with you. I'll take care of you...You're the way a man your age should look. I don't want a starved little queen." However, in an elaborate twist of irony, Julien develops AIDS and needs Austin's constant devotion.

Acclaimed award-winning writer Edmund White pens a deeply moving love story of two individuals with illusions about their own lives that create a real, solid and enduring love.

a most beautiful book.......2004-09-26

I loved this book. I loved the writing, and read it very slowly to savor the language. How could it be that a story so ulitmately tragic, could be so rich and full of life? It dazzled me.

Not What I Expected.......2004-07-11

I guess I looked for White to provide thought provoking insight into the older/younger gay relationship. I found the book dull and lacking any real direction. The characters were uninteresting and one demensional. The plot dragged on and on and never really went anywhere. I actually found myself skipping paragraphs trying to get to the point of the story. I apologize to anyone who might find this review offensive, but I didn't enjoy this book at all.

Not really worth reading.......2004-03-12

Austin Smith is a middle-aged American writer, living in Paris, looking for new love from men. He meets Julien, a young married man...

I enjoyed reading 'A Boy's Own Story', written by this writer, which I rated very highly, and therefore I thought I would read another book by Edmund White. However, 'The Married Man' was a disappointing read.

'The Married Man' lacks much in the way of plot. Instead, its content depends mainly on the main character leading a not spectacularly unusual life, but travelling from place to new place and to new venues far too often, extravagantly, rather than working, so the writer can then describe in detail yet another set of new scenes and events and characters and yet more huge expenditure in the new place/venue. That method of creating a book, and the absence of much interesting plot besides, made the book tiresome after a while. I felt I was being made to read material that had being written simply in order to pad the book out unnecessarily.

The content itself becomes quite depressing in the second half of the book.

The style of writing, often with very long turgid sentences and over-complicated similes, suggests the book has been too overwritten ('A Boy's Own Story', in contrast, had a much more interesting, direct, snappy style of writing to it).

Frankly, the main characters aren't likeable (apart from Ajax).

This book was slow going to read, and not a pleasurable experience: more a grim slow turning of the pages, just to finish the thing off.

The writer hasn't really attempted any form of climax to the book, or even a good ending, either. He just lets the book tail off into nothingness after 310 pages.

Book Description

he bestselling Brightness Falls--now in trade paper from the author of Bright Lights, Big City. In the story of Russell and Corrine Calloway, set against the world of New York publishing, McInerney provides a stunningly accomplished portrayal of people contending with early success, then getting lost in the middle of their lives.

Customer Reviews:

"Shivering at the dark threshold.".......2007-08-07

"Rich men, trust not in wealth,
Gold cannot buy you health;
Physic himself must fade,
All things to end are made.
The plague full swift goes by . . .

. . . Beauty is but a flower
Which wrinkles will devour.
Brightness falls from the air,
Queens have died young and fair;
Dust hath closed Helen's eye.
I am sick, I must die" (pp. 412-13).

With a writing style that has been compared to Hemingway, Fitzgerald, and Waugh. Jay McInerney's (1955) love story, Brightness Falls (1992), tells the sobering morality tale of a "perfect" New York couple, Russell and Corrine Calloway, and the gradual disintegration of their marriage (along the lines of Bergman's Scenes from a Marriage). Russell is now a literary editor at a prominent downtown publishing house, and Corrine is an anorexic stockbroker with a "Mother Teresa syndrome" (she volunteers in a soup kitchen). Set in the mid-1980s, McInerney's novel takes on the politics of love, the tensions between love and sex, and how relationships can falter over time. At odds with his mentor (Harold Stone), Russell attempts a hostile takeover of his publishing company with the help of a corporate raider (Bernie Melman), while also pursuing an affair with his investment banker (Trina). Corrine leaves Russell after his scheme fails, but their relationship manages to survive. McInerney ends his literate, subtle, insightful novel on a poignant note with Russell contemplating (as Corrine nests and dozes on his shoulder) "that whatever plenty befalls them together or separately in the future, they will become more and more intimate with loss as the years accumulate, friends dying or slipping away undramatically into the crowded past, memory itself finally flickering and growing treacherous toward the end; knowing that even the children who may be in their future will eventually school them in the pain of growth and separation, as their own parents and mentors die off and leave them alone in the world, shivering at the dark threshold" (p. 416). McInerney's characters, Russell and Corrine, return in his 2006 novel, The Good Life. Highly recommended.

G. Merritt

Elegiac.......2007-04-19

One can stand at a distance and criticize this novel as a tale of two self-absorbed yuppies, or one can come closer and actually read the book and find that it's not so easy to dismiss. Corinne and Russell are very real people, and McInerney does an excellent job fleshing them out. I sympathized with Corinne, a true lost soul who feels helpless as her husband's drive to succeed starts to change him, and also felt as indignant as Russell for the way he was being treated by his superior at the publishing company. All along the way, I felt dread in the pit of my stomach as to what would happen with Russell's attempt to takeover the company, but since McInerney sets the novel in the months right before the Stock Market Crash of 1987, that dread is most likely intentional.

This is the third McInerney novel I've read, and I can now say that I am a fan. "Brightness Falls" is denser and more complex than "Bright Lights, Big City" and "Story of My Life" but it doesn't hit a false note. He conveys late 80s Manhattan perfectly, and juggles the myriad points of view like a pro.

Why this novel does not have "National Bestseller" emblazoned across the top surprises me. Perhaps in 1992, people just weren't in the mood to read a novel about 80s excess, feeling it was too soon. Their loss. Several years on, this novel holds up very well. Interesting that the book also somewhat mirrors the Manhattan of today, where finance is once again booming, real estate is over the top and many are living well. People live high, and there's no real sign of stopping. Will this new world of ugly luxury condos (face it, they're ugly), the vanishing arts frontier and dwindling middle class last forever, supplanting a vibrant city with a glossy, homogeneous veneer? It seems that way; nobody foresees an end to to this new gilded age. The hubris is thick in the air and brightness falls when people least expect it.

The best of the best.......2006-01-24

Brightness Falls is Jay McInerney's best, hands down. While I loved his earlier books like Bright Lights Big City and Story of My Life, this is the book where McInerney shows us what he can do. BF is about a married 30-year old couple Russell and Corrine whom to their friends are as perfect as perfect can be, with their good looks, uncomplicated lives, and easy going natures. Underneath, they are also decent people who are sympathetic and all too human. Russell is drawn into the wild world of M&A sweeping through Manhattan on the eve of the 1987 stock market crash. Corrine balks but there's nothing she can do but stand by her man. Things go great and then bad quickly as we would expect. The plot is interesting but it's not the plot that gives this book its soul. It's the finely drawn characters and McInerney's ability to capture things just perfectly. There are passages which for sheer brilliance I re-read just to savor them. McInerney can take a simple scene and render it so vividly you can see your own life and memories mirrored in it. For instance, there is one chapter in which Russell returns home to the midwest to visit his father, an aging breed of General Motors execs living out his twilight years in a pleasant suburb of Detroit. The complicated emotions McInerney teases out, the exchange between father and son, these are depicted so truthfully, I could feel my own heart twist and contort as I thought of visits to my own family. BF is an example of truly inspired and inspiring writing.

the new thinking is all about loss.......2005-10-22

Brightness Falls is kind of dated (80s) but has some really fresh observations on ambition and failure. There's also a very complex reading of the breaking-up thing towards the end, and one of the best epigraphs ever. Definitely read McInerney but start with Bright Lights, Big City.

The Best Novel About Late 1980's Yuppie Culture.......2005-09-18

Set just before the 1987 stock market crash and taking its title from a macabre 17th century poem about the unavoidable ruination of youth, beauty, ambition and life itself, Jay Mcinerney's finest novel is the tale of a twenty-something married couple, Russell and Corrine, who live in New York City at the height of '80's excess and glamour. The man whose life forms the basis of this novel, Russell, is an aspiring writer who has shelved his ambitions and taken up work as a publisher, editing and pushing through other peoples' books. He is unhappy at his job, slightly bored in his marriage, and when the chance comes up to advance himself and become part-owner of a faltering publishing house, he seizes it....exactly days before the ruination the market collapse brings on. This is a novel of expertly appreciated manners and mores in Reagan's New York, augmented by a fabulously-sketched cast of characters, all moved along at a brisk pace by the power of Mcinerney writing in top form. Thus far this is the author's best novel and probably the greatest of all examinations of life among the upwardly-mobile in 1980's Manhattan.

Average customer rating:

great novel
forbidden love in new england
Timeless Writing

The Narrows
Ann Petry
Manufacturer: Mariner Books
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Contemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

Literary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books

ASIN: 0618007105

Book Description

When Link Williams, a college-educated twenty-six-year-old African-American man, falls for Camilo Sheffield, a wealthy married white woman, things will never be the same in the sleepy New England town of Monmouth, Connecticut. Set in the 1950s, this unforgettable classic deftly evokes a tragic love affair and offers a window onto the powerful ways in which class, race, and love intersected in midcentury America.

Customer Reviews:

great novel.......2006-03-22

Such a great novel. I will read it again, but this time slover and with notetaking.

forbidden love in new england.......2001-01-31

this one is about a interracial couple in connecticut in the 1950's...ms petry manages to handle this story with a cool handle never allow it to become merely tabloid fodder..some of the other plots that were interesting was link's relationship with bill hod, who was practically his father and the butler who marries a promisculous heavy-set black women...

Timeless Writing.......2000-09-05

The Narrows was written in 1953. Amazing. Timeless love story of a Dartmouth grad of history who happens to be black and a rich married heiress who happens to be white. Their lives intersect one night in Harlem and continue down a dangerous road of love, passion, and retribution. The star of the book is Link Williams, a young man adopted at the age of eight by Abbie Crunch and the Major. When the Major dies, Link feels invisible and finds a new home in the Last Chance bar where Bill Hod becomes his surrogate father, teaching Link what it means to be a man, a black man.

He grows up strong and intelligent, but faltering in one area. The area of love. The woman that he chooses, the one he wants to marry unbeknownst to him is already married. Worst of all she is white. This breaks many hearts, the people who have loved him and taken care of him, Abbie Crunch, Weak Knees, Bill Hod, and the rest of the Last Chance patrons where Link is the heart and soul, all watch as he make this fatal mistake.

Phenomenal writing, literature, pure art without the sensationalism that is prevalent in our books today.

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